SPOOPYWEEN DAY 31 SAW 10!!!!!

Day 31

SAW 10

I joked about it, but we are actually doing it. We are watching and reviewing SAW 10.

10 fucking SAW films. God man.

This franchise is, well. It’s silly, stupid, has maybe 3 actual good ones, and the fact the titular character somehow made enough tapes to cover 7 or so of these sequels is. Well hilarious.

So of course we close out with something fun and bloody.

I used to enjoy the stupid trailer line they would run with these sequels. “If it’s Halloween, it must be SAW”.

This franchise was never something people heavily invested in. Despite what the filmmakers might feel.

Because these things are absolutely, comically insane. Yet everyone enjoys them. Why? You want to see how they’re going to keep the franchise going! You want to see how Jigsaw is still making tapes after he’s died. HOW many tapes he’s made before he died, and exactly how many traps did he plan BEFORE HE DIED!!

You get it…

It’s the same sort of guilty pleasure we all get from Friday the 13th films. You aren’t there for the story. You want to know how they bring Jason back THIS time, and you want to see the deaths. That’s the selling points and it’s why we all watch these things.

I could do a whole special on the saw films. The things just get more and more ridiculous as they went on. But that’s part of the fun. Every SAW film you are guaranteed, a trap in the beginning, elaborate traps no one is escaping from later on, betrayal, and a convoluted flashback sequence at the end showing you how this killer is connected to that victim that’s connected to this person who’s connected to Jigsaw.

Seriously if you were to go through the previous films, it just blows your mind, and you just. Give up at some point in hoping it makes sense.

For a dying man Jigsaw was a very, very busy guy.

But something that always made me laugh about him, And the movies always carried the theme of.

Is his insistence that, he is not a killer. He doesn’t kill people.

There have been so many traps people died violently in, that either could not escape the trap? Or beat it. But still died. He killed these people. But he always said he gave people the choice. To truly fight to live, or die. If they survive his traps. They appreciate life. They are more thankful and enjoy the gift they are given.

But every single person who Jigsaw ended up saving, he ended up recruiting and using to HELP him investigate, kidnap and trap MORE people.

He had a murder pyramid scheme and it was pretty great.

Things were quiet on the SAW front for a long time. Then they came out with SPIRAL, which starred Chris Rock and…………well that was something.

It didn’t do so well, but. By some miracle. Here we are. With a tenth installment. And with Tobin Bell back as Jigsaw. In a prequel. Which is how they get away with his being alive this time around. This film is set between the first and second SAW films. Which retcons a LOT of things thankfully we won’t have to likely worry about. What am I saying. It’s ALL going to connect, this is SAW. So best to watch the other 9 films first so you can get up to speed.

Or just, you know….not.

ANYWAY, no more jibber jabbering Let’s play a game.

The film

And so we begin. With a trap? You bet your ass. But is it a clever one? No not really.

Jigsaw is at his early days of being told he has months to live, which sucks when you plan to keep testing people and their will to live. Naturally.

But he’s doing the best he can, and is understandably unhappy with having to accept what others tell him, and the idea when you are told you’re dying. The quicker you make peace with it, the better. Which I get but. It still sucks man.

No the trap is not an actual trap. It’s metaphorical. The man is trying to find any means of surviving this cancer, and proving to doctors that with a strong enough will, and fight. Things are possible.

Okay there actually IS a real trap, but its in his mind and that explains the lameness of the trap. He’s in the hospital getting treatment, and as he gets a drink from the fountain, he witnesses a janitor debating stealing from a patient in bad condition. So. In his mind, he is putting the man into a trap he’s devised and the film uses as its poster art. The man is strapped in a chair, with two penis pumps pushed against his eyeballs, and his fingers placed in pressurized little harnesses. His challenge, or game. Is to turn a dial which has 4 levels. Each level he passes, will break a finger. The man has a choice. Break all his fingers, or the penis enlargement pumps will suction out his eyeballs.

In his mind, the man only manages to break a few fingers, and gets his eyes sucked out. But we see the janitor makes the decision not to steal, and as he exits the room John congratulates him on making the right choice.

Honestly? I don’t know about that.

Firstly, the trap is….well to put it best. It seems more like a trap an aging Jigsaw would come up with, after running out of all his other good trap ideas. Or to be more realistic. The series creator running out of ideas. Like Family Guy when they made fun of Stephen King running on empty and selling the idea of a novel about a haunted lamp.

Secondly. This trap is kind of a no brainer, but also like some of the past traps that actually DID happen in the films. It’s only made worse by purposely taking your time. I know you have to try and make the audience squirm but. Realistically? If your options, break your fingers, or lose your eyes? Are you going to just dial one…two…three? No. You spin that dial to max. Get it over with all at once. You do it one at a time, you are making it more painful on yourself.

It's like pulling a band aid off. Either you grip it and rip it, suffering a few moments of ‘ow’ that fade away. Or. You grip it and slowly pull it, dragging out every moment of ‘ow, ow. OW’

If you want to end up with broken fingers and being able to stare down at the horrific sight? Spin the dial. If you wanna suffer the pain of having two penis pumps suck your eyes out of your head, AND sit blind in a chair with the pain of several snapped fingers. Well it’s certainly a choice.

Not gonna lie it actually sucks having a fake out like that for a SAW trap, but it also is a relief when you realize something that lame was only in the mans head.

Which yes. Given the actors age in reality, versus his age in the films timeline, His head is. Looking its time. We’ll say.

But the movie isn’t here to serve as a peek into Johns brain. For that you’d need to revisit SAW 3. Where you get an ACTUAL look at his brain.

No, this film is about vengeance. Which you can see how it’s being setup already within the first 15 minutes rather plainly. Had you followed the other SAW films, you know of Jigsaws terminal cancer, and how he made one last desperate attempt at staving off death in part 3. This film off the bat is setting up that John is, going to get scammed, and scammed hard.

As he’s out and about, dreaming of random traps to torture and test peoples will to live. He runs into a man he remembered from a terminal cancer patient support group. Only the man is enjoying ice cream with the spirit of the living, and not someone knocking at deaths door. So. He has some questions about this.

Thankfully the man is more than willing to show John his surgical scar. Which is unholy and near unbelievably wide and huge. I also half expected the guy to not show a surgical scar, but just randomly flop his dick out on the table to establish dominance. But that’s just me.

He tells John about a miracle surgery he had, they removed his terminal cancer, it was amazing. Expensive, but he’s a new man with a joy for life. John hears this and has questions. Because he is a man that deals with giving people a joy for life. But also the cancer, and he’d like to not die. Which I can sympathize with. We all can.

This begins John’s journey of digging into the interwebs and researching this miracle cancer curing surgical center. Somewhere. In rural Mexico. Past the drug fields run by the cartel, Way out in the middle of nowhere. In a totally legitimate setting.

So John gets a call from the lead doctor in charge, he’s given reassurances, and told that while he has months to live. They can get him in next week, and reverse that. Giving him all the time in the world. For a nominal fee.

This is where the fun begins. Literally its funny as hell.

The man arrives in Mexico and meets a friendly Taxi driver waiting for him, complete with a name card and friendly hand. He’s getting a nice quiet tour of the Mexican streets, and as they round off toward his destination. A black van with blacked out windows suddenly rolls up in front of them. Armed men leap out all of them pointing weapons at John and his driver. They yank John out of the car and with guns aimed at him begin demanding his name. The moment he gives it and reassures them that IS his name…they tell him to come with them, it’s totally cool. They’ll drive him to the facility.

If you are, mildly confused. But incredibly amused. Welcome to the club.

Did they hire the local cartel to help escort people to the hospital? A hospital meant for dying people to receive life saving surgery? I mean if you have no choice sure. But sending 7 guys with black mask, dressed in black, shoving guns in your face? Before calmly aiding you into their van and black bagging you? That’s just comedy gold.

It made no damn sense and why they did it, god knows. But it made me laugh.

So John arrives, is greeted by people at a villa near a large abandoned gas works facility. He’s treated kindly, with elder gloves, and gentle smiles. When he ask about the cartel welcome wagon. He’s just told, and I shit you not. They had to beef up security lately. Because Big Medicine doesn’t like them saving lives.

Sure why not.

As hope fills John’s heart, and these people ready to empty his pocketbook. We are treated honestly to something these movies have never given us before. Moments letting Tobin Bell act. And the man is a good actor. He’s done some very good films outside of this film series. He really is talented. Just, usually in these films he’s dying and eventually dead. Delivering speeches about hope, not being a murderer, and playing a game.

So it’s nice seeing the man actually GIVEN more screen time and more to do, than the puppet on a bike in this damn series.

Of course the surgery goes well, and he wakes up in a place far the hell away from where he was. He’s told everything was a success, he’s going to live a long life, everything is cool.

It’s fucked up.

WE know he’s not cured, we know from the other films he’s FAR from cured. But yes also seeing scam artist like this is fucked up, because those assholes really pull shit like that. Maybe not to that degree but. Praying those near death desperate for more time. It’s a shit thing.

But fear not. Before we can feel sad for a Jigsaw that is smiling with the sun on his face, crying because he’s going to live and everything will be okay. The movie is giving us and the internet more comedy gold.

So. A man who learned he was dying, who picked up the…….hobby. Of giving people the actual choice to live, or die, to fight for the precious gift which he was having cut short. Now has a new lease on life. He survived the trap of terminal cancer. You’d imagine he would be out drinking, enjoying life. Smiling watching children play and young lovers embrace.

No.

I mean. He IS smiling, and happy. Happy for this second chance, and watching people enjoy being alive. All while he sits at a park bench in Mexico. Idly sketching in his little book, death traps.

It’s the funniest fucking thing and I love it. He’s so happy he’s no longer dying, and he can now continue his legacy as The Jigsaw Killer. Creating traps to torture people and force them to mutilate themselves. All with beautiful music, children playing, and the sun beaming down on his face.

Seriously this moment has already achieved meme status and there are some good ones out there. I love this movie. This is the kinda dumb fun we wished the last movie gave us. And we still have 2 hours left to go.

Yeah. This is a long one.

So of course it doesn’t take long for John to discover the trueth. He’s a happy man, he wants to thank those who saved him. And using his keen memory and landmarks. The man pieces together just where the building was. So he has a taxi drive him out, ready to smile and embrace those who helped him. Complete with a bottle of Rosé. Only to discover the place is empty. Doors left open, shit thrown around. Medical equipment left and tossed over. To be fair John could look at all this and determine “Oh, the cartel must also handle the cleaning, maybe they escorted them out so the cleaning people could come in”, but no. He is thankfully smarter than that. He realizes not only did they vanish after taking his money. But they didn’t even bother cutting open his skull. It was all a scam. A terrible, terrible scam. Oh the horror.

Now we get to the revenging.

Which is equally hilarious.

First on the list, is our friendly Taxi driver. I mean he WAS a part of the thing, right? He drove him halfway to the place before the others took over. So he’s in on it at the lowest level and not as bad as the others-WHO CARES TRAP TIME!!

As our Taxi man awakens. He finds himself in a highly, questionable state.

His hands, up to his wrist are bound in duct tape. With a sharp surgical knife in both hands. So they’re taped holding these knives. On his forearms, there are two pipe bombs. Stitched through his flesh using some kind of thick cabling.

His mission, should he choose to accept. Is to cut the pipe bombs off his arms. Using the knifes taped to his hands. He has 3 minutes to cut through both his arms to remove these bombs, and move away before they explode.

Let us not question how cutting layers of flesh and muscle in a panic would severely weaken one arm and make cutting through the other incredibly difficult. Or the loss of blood and your body entering a state of shock causing your death as you pass out and bleed to death. Let us enjoy the man taking a full minute to wonder around looking for alternative ways to escape, and nudge the bombs off his arms. Before realizing, hey. I want to live. Guess I’ll cut my arms.

And cut he does. The man actually manages to join the exclusive Jigsaw Life Appreciation club. He cuts both bombs from his arms. Kicks them away and as he cries, bleeding out on the floor, John walks over to him, gives him a high five, and tells him how he will appreciate life now, and recruits the man to his cause.

Yes. The man who he drugged, and stitched pipe bombs onto his arms. Congratulated him and asked him to join his team. Because apparently when a serial killer(who says he isn’t a murderer) helps you to value being alive. Of course you’ll want to work for him.

So with the help of Taxi Driver, and his network of people that survived his past two traps in America, he begins using them all to help him obtain further vengeance.

So we get a montage of sorts showing us John and his lackeys gathering up the house keeper, doctors, nurse, the gardener, his dog and the window cleaner. Everyone who done did wrong John, is now accounted for and ready for their own traps. As a wise jedi once said, Here’s where the fun begins.

Literally and figuratively.

This film. I love these movies, but this also has that feeling some return to classic films get. Where you watch it, you are happy seeing faces you know? But you also feel “Okay, maybe it’s time to put them to bed, give them their fruit snack, and send them off to bed”

We’ll get to that.

As for the people in this? Honestly. This is legitimately one of the few SAW films, where you can say the people they are after, legitimately deserve what’s coming. They are truly horrible people. The others in past SAW films? For the large part they were people with mild streaks of bad. We had a junky he stole money to support her habit, a doctor that didn’t try hard enough, a guy who sold a motorcycle that had bad breaks, An author who made money lying about his experience as a survivor. These are questionable things yeah, things that make them assholes. But did they deserve death traps? Not especially? These people though? Pulling fake miracle surgeries and taking dying peoples money? Robbing them before they die? Yeah. That’s more deserving. And for the most part no one makes it out of these traps. Either because they failed, or the traps were rigged so they would die.

But remember, Jigsaw is not a killer. He simply offers the choice. Live or die. Which is still…nevermind.

The theme here, as John tells us. Is hope. These people feed off the last thing dying people have. The hope they can beat this and live. So, that is the basis of his traps. They fed off the hope of the dying. So now here they are in the same situation. Do they have enough hope to survive and do what is needed? Or will they accept death and let it happen.

And to help John make this point, is an old series minion. That no one really liked after the 2nd SAW film. Amanda.

Amanda was an interesting character at first. She survived the reverse beartrap face trap from the first film. She then was recruited by Jigsaw and helped him with his other ‘games’, she posed as a victim in the second film, and in the third she went full tilt fucking jealous bitch crazy. No one really cared for the character as I said and, if you watched the films. You’ll get why.

But here she is. Playing the same character. Between the first and second film. The fun part about this. Goes along with as I mentioned, the seeing people and things you kinda liked from something, and feeling its time to put them to bed. She is supposed to be playing her mid 20 year old self. She is, far older than that now. They all are. She is a fine person in real life and a good actress. But in this film, dressed as she is playing this character. She looks like an ex twice my age, when her hair was thinning who decided to dye her hair black and wear band shirts. Like Steve Buscemi in the “Greetings fellow Kids” meme. She has the worst haircut, and she is, showing her age. Unfortunately.

But.

But, but, but. I give them credit. The filmmakers could’ve used de-aging cgi on the actors. They didn’t. That technology is always evolving still, and it doesn’t really work that well yet. Yet.

So having These two play their characters who are supposed to be much younger, at their current age? It’s a bold choice. But they went for it.

Speaking of bold choice. TRAP TIME!

This time we start with one of the ladies. Because, ladies first. I guess. Or not.

This is a trap that, seems fitting cruel, versus offering a way out. Her game is thus. She has to saw her leg off mid thigh, then. She has to use a suction pump. Which she will have to jab into her leg bone. To syphon out enough marrow, to tip a small scale. If she is successful? She will stop the timer, and prevent herself from being beheaded, and I guess receive an application from Jigsaw.

Well. Surprisingly she saws her damn leg off. Which is unintentionally funny vs gory. Though it is gory. It’s just funny seeing someone using razor wire like a seesaw. But she does it, bless her heart. She cuts her leg off, mid though. Somehow has the energy to jam the suction pipe into her leg bone, aaaand, she dies. She didn’t make it in time, she either jammed the thing into the meat of her leg and THEN hit the bone, or she didn’t go deep enough.

Again. Is it because she deserved death and he made it painfully impossible? Or was it another trap where you need to be a fucking surgeon to survive. Seriously sawing your foot off was what the doctor had to do in the first saw film to survive. He did. With a thin bladed hand saw. This lady has to use razor wire to cut her leg off, AND THEN siphon bone marrow. I mean goddamn dude. I’m not saying she deserves a participation victory for completing Stage 1, but I am saying that should you know, count for something. You are asking a lot of someone who has to operate on themselves. It’s one of those, I get it. I don’t like it, but I get it. For a “I’m not a murderer” Jigsaw, that’s a pretty murderous trap.

But get ready for the arrival of the fun bus!

Much like rodeo clowns are there to lighten the seriousness. We have these SAW moments.

Jigsaw leaves to head upstairs with Amanda for some one on one time. Discussing the right and wrong of what they’re doing, and how, as Amanda see’s it. The doctor lady, the actual leader of this thing. She deserves death more than any of them. Which is a fair point. Absolutely. However, Jigsaw as that belief. Everyone deserves a chance. Which is commendable. Except for the fact these people in all these movies have a 90% death rate in his traps.

But that isn’t the fun. The fun is the desperation of Cecilia, the head doctor lady. As Jigsaw and Amanda have their alone time, Cecilia is exploring her options. As a cellphone belonging to one of them goes off on a table. She decides they have a resource for help nearby. They must make use of this. So what are her options to get to this unreachable table? Nothing. Well. Almost nothing.

We have a headless body.

That body has large intestines.

Yep. Cecilia is a woman who wants to survive, and will do anything so she can survive. She manages to find a piece of shrapnel and uses it to cut open the ladies gut. Taring out her intestines, proclaiming “We have rope”

In the greatest, most wonderful fashion. This bitch, and her cohorts. Play the funniest game of catch the intestines. Using them to wrap it around the table, and slowly pull it over to her. I mean, it’s creative. Absolutely. But it’s also goddamn hilarious. Watching someone swing intestines from one person to another, then back toward Cecilia, to create a loop around the table and pull it toward herself.

But it works. She manages to get the cellphone and quickly makes a, mystery call. She could call the authorities, She could call the president. Anyone. Instead, she calls someone close to her, and has a 5 word exchange speaking Norwegian. Yes it’s a twist incoming. Why only 5 words though? Because Amanda was talking to John, but also watching the monitors So Amanda tases her, and the cellphone, along with the intestinal rope is taken.

It's just funny as hell, and its meant to be clever. But its predictable. And silly. I love it.

What do I mean by predictable though. Well. No sot soon after her short phone call, an unaccounted for party to this fake hospital arrives. The bearded man who said he’d be assisting during the procedure. Who also claimed to be a miracle patient, he even had the nifty bandage on his neck where a tumor was removed recently. And he’s still going to work in an operation that…..should have been a warning.

Well he arrives, Is captured. And interrogated by John and Amanda. He entered the building screaming about wanting his money from these ‘lying cheating bastards’, so John lets him say his peace. Apparently the man was bamboozled same as John. He saw no surgery scar on his neck. He knows they lied. He wants his money.

HOW he knew where the facility was, when John even had to piece it all together so he could find the place. HOW he knew the peoples names. No one knows. It’s odd right? It’s, almost. Conveniently odd. Some might even say. SET….UP….odd. But Jogn is willing to believe the guy so sure recruit him for the cause.

I am. Sure. This will not. Bite him in the ass. Somehow.

But, as a familiar face slowly wheels their way onto the screen. It’s time for another game. Because we are running out of movie.

Yes everyones favorite beloved puppet makes his return to the series, complete on his little tricycle. How Amanda got that into Mexico I don’t even know.

This is the most ‘you are fucked’ game, and I mean that. It’s still funny just for the pure Ludacris nature of it. But here we go. This time it’s the man who played brain surgeon. Well, now he has to actually do brain surgery. John has him strapped to a chair. His task here, is to take the tools provided by the puppet, cut open his own skull, remove said piece of skull, and pull out enough bits of his brain, to tip a scale and free him.

He also has the same 3 minutes afforded him as everyone else did.

So…

Cutting a circle out of your own skull. Using a Dremel no less. Coupled with cutting and pulling out chunks of your own brain. So if you tip the scale, you live…

Poking your brain is, never the answer, nor is it a good idea. Ever. So asking someone to cut their skull open, THEN dig out bits of their brain.

What happens if you cut into the part of your brain that helps you to function? Or you go from Yes I can do this, I must pull my brains out, too “I can potato”. But bless his thieving heart. The man decides to go for it. He uses a Dremel, cuts a very impressively circular bit of skull out, And cuts into his own brain.

He manages a pretty hefty chunk. But it is NEARLY what was needed to free him. He screams in anguish, praying it’ll keep moving the scale. Which it appears to ever so slowly do. But his timer runs out, and we see heating elements on either side of this contraption around his head begin to glow with heat. Jigsaw attached heating elements to this contraption around the mans head. They heat up, scorching his face, and the trap springs shut. Revealing a comical Mayan mask that seals round his head, as the heating elements cook his face and brain.

Again I am conflicted.

How in the hell. Do you expect someone to not only have the strength and steadiness of hand, through a great deal of pain. To cut a portion of their skull off, and then follow that act up, with cutting their damn brain, If you know nothing about how the brain works. And what the hell you are doing. You are just scrambling the thing that helps you to function, communicate. TELL YOUR BODY WHAT TO DO. What if he tore out a huge chunk and just became a drooling mess?? Would he still be able to transfer the brain matter to the scale? And is that really living at that point? You damaged your own brain and will need machines to keep you ‘functioning’ and alive. Congrats on solving my brain surgery puzzle?

Just take the L my dude. But no. The guy really did try. He could’ve had it. But time ran out, no participation trophy. His time is done.

Also 3 minutes to do that is. Cutting it pretty tight. There is a lot of pain involved with this and the hope they won’t pass out is. STRONG.

But alas. Man dug into his brain. Found nothing of value, and got fried.

So moving on!

Rather quickly in fact. We are now with Gabriela. The lady he bought the bottle of wine for. So whats her trap? Does she have to pull a knife buried in her ass out, and use it to cut a vile of acid out of her throat?

She is strung up and bound by two chains one on her right leg, one on her left wrist. A powerful radiation fueled machine is aimed at her face. She has 3 minutes, to use a large heavy hammer. To break the bones in her wrist and ankle. To free herself, or she will be burned by radiation to the face.

Really?

I mean…really?

REALLY?

It seems like a bit of a dip in severity here from the previous traps. Like either those two before her had critical failure dice rolls, and she got a critical success, or Jigsaw pulled the traps out of a hat and she got SUPER lucky. Or Old man Jigsaw couldn’t think of a cooler trap than the face heater mask. So he just shrugged and said break your bones and you live.

What will happen? Will she die? Will she live?

The heat. Will be on!

She survives.

How could she not. If she failed that? If I were next up. I’d call her weak. You get the simplest challenge of the group so far, and you fuck it up somehow? Yeah, I’m calling you out. But she did it. She survived. She broke her ankle and slips out of the restraint. She broke her wrist and fell to the floor. Her face is heavily scorched and full of radiation. Sure. But she survived. So. Thumbs up Gabriela.

So who’s up next? Well, not the evil doctor lady. But Jigsaw!

Yes! I mean no! I mean, how!

Well by some shocking turn of events no one could have foreseen. Beardo turns out to be the boyfriend of evil Cecilia. So of course when left on his own, he gets ahold of his gun he came there with, and is now locking up Jigsaw and Amanda. The plan now, is to kill these two, naturally. While Blonde evil doctor lady and her bearded man escape with all the money.

But first she has to gloat. Because she is evil you see.

Her boyfriend however is impatient. So he puts forward the idea hey. Lets put John and Amanda in this unused final trap. Let them die in their own twisted game. Well that’s poetic justice. Sort of. I don’t know.

Only Cecilia has a better idea. They all hear a ball being kicked against the side of the building. They check the camera feed and. Shockingly. Somehow out there. Is the little boy, who John spotted earlier before his surgery. That he helped fix his bike wheel for. So Cecilia leads the boy inside, and instead of Amanda and Jigsaw dying on one of his traps. She is going to put a little boy on the trap with Jigsaw.

The idea being, this boy Carlos is an innocent who had nothing to do with any of these events or their scam. So John, if he truly values the innocent. Will let himself die on this trap, and spare the kid. Otherwise, he’s a monster and feels his own life and survival mean more than the life of a kid.

So what trap is this? What devious invention awaits?

An actual pretty thoughtful one surprisingly. Though highly impractical, again.

Two bodies are chained down and lays on a table. While being waterboarded with blood.

The table is like a seesaw. Both are on opposite sides of each other. The table has two levers. One on each side of the other person. If the table is left parallel. Blood will flow freely down on both people. Killing both of them eventually by…drowning. In blood. If Jigsaw pulls his lever, it will lower his end of the table and the blood flow will stop on one end of the trap. Sparing the boy. Or the boy can pull his lever and drown. While saving Jigsaw.

So the game begins. Who will be killed. Will Jigsaw sacrifice the boy? Or himself!!

Well again as this was a prequel, we know Jigsaw lives. So no. He won’t be dying.

Its another comical trap because….the blood.

How in the hell. In such a short time. An incredibly short time. Jigsaw was able to gather 40 gallons. Gallons with a G, of blood? Who knows. But there is a literal flood of blood on both of them and it is never ending. Just. Never fucking ending.

So. Beardo decides screw watching them die, I’m getting the money, lets get out of here. So Cecilia follows and they head upstairs to the room Jigsaw and Amanda used as their HQ.

This would be the perfect moment for a surprise wouldn’t it? Almost…as if…it was….SET….UP?

Yes. Yes it was.

Beardo is the first to begin wondering. If Jigsaws last trap, was setup for two people? And Cecilia would be the last person. Who was meant as the second person for the trap?

Cecilia doesn’t care. She sees the bag of money from all the people they scammed, grabs it and is ready to go. The moment she grabs the bag. It activates Jigsaws TRUE and final trap.

The doors to the room seal. The SAW theme begins to blast out at full volume. And we get the films signature flashback. Showing the entire setup. How John knew about them dating before hand. How he anticipated she would be so ruthless as to gut a coworker and use their intestines as a rope to call her boyfriend. It’s all bullshit. Yes. Absolute. Stinky. Bullshit. BUT. It’s SAW bullshit. It’s what we have come to expect, love, and look forward to laughing at in these films. Seriously this is it. This is what we all wait for. Like Poirot and his get everyone in the parlor to explain what really happened scene.

It's just so damn silly, and contrived. It must be SAW.

So the room those two are in begins to fill with a toxic gas. Two rats in a cage, left to deal with one another. Of course they will screw each other to live. That’s the idea. But just wait. Because it’s not going to be that satisfying. Unfortunately.

Cecilia is a heartless witch who is in full survival mode. No matter how strong Beardo’s dick game might be. She can find a battery powered replacement. The room has one out. A single hole in the wall, like a gloryhole. So only one of them can stick their head out of it, and chance surviving.

But. Even though it is unsaid. Like ALL of Jigsaws puzzles. There is a chance for both of them to survive. They just would have to work together. But they are both horrible selfish people. So they don’t realize it. Had they taken turns. Each one of them taking a breath through the opening? They would survive. The time had 10 minutes on it when it went off, and immediately the room began filling with gas. It wasn’t a death timer. It was a timer for the gas. Had they taken turns with the gloryhole, they could have both survived, because after 10 minutes, sure enough. The gas stops. But no. Being selfish thieves, Cecilia stabs her Bearded bear of a man. Killing him and shoving her head through the gloryhole.

She survives.

As she breathes sweet fresh air, she sees John, Amanda, and Carlos the kid all leaving the building. She calls out to Jigsaw and he gets to deliver his signature line one more time. “Game over”, and the trio walk out. Shutting the door, and the films title appears in bold letters before rolling credits.

That is, until of course we get a mid credit scene, where we discover that the man from the cancer support group who first told John about the surgery and showed him his huge ass scar? He has been found back in the U.S. Not by Jigsaw, but by his other cohort and trap survivor. Detective Hoffman. One of the actual few good things to come from the SAW franchise. He played a good bad guy that took over once Jigsaw passed and Amanda followed.  But then they killed him off. So having him back, even for one scene. Where we see he helped Jigsaw locate the last man needed for his vengeance to Mexico trip. It's still something.

And with that, the film ends not on one John Kramer famous line, but his first and mostest famoustest of lines. “I want to play a game”

AND THEN. The movie ends. As does…another month.

The End

I will admit. When I saw this came out in October. I laughed, and I pre-ordered it immediately, and I knew I would save it for the end of this list. I had to. I had no idea what the other films would be like aside the very few I had watched before. So letting chance and the dice decide which ones were shown was great, and thankfully we had a lot of successes. But I wanted to assure this month would have at least the most likeliness of ending on a good note. So SAW as always, provided. I’m glad for it.

This movie was, admittedly. One of the better SAW films. Which is saying both a lot, and a little.

It’s saying a lot because after part 3 in the series. Part 4 was an…okay I guess it makes Sense Jigsaw had one last game to play. Sure. But then it kept going, and going, and eventually something interesting happened, then it died out, and kept going. Somehow John Kramer recorded, plotted, and perfectly guessed the outcome of enough future traps to ensure he’d get to keep killing people for 5 more sequels.

Seriously it got insanely funny and this is again why most fans like it as a guilty pleasure. You know what to expect, and no matter how silly, dumb, or removed the ‘plot’ might be. It will always deliver the blood and traps.

Even though, this film really did feel, a lot. And often. Like they ran out of ideas for traps and really scraped the bottom of the barrel. Though I do consider it a ballsy move using a fake dream trap as your poster art. Knowing people will want to see that and talk about it. Only to then have to now add “Yeah it was gross, but it wasn’t real he just thought of doing it” which is sad. But hey.

And again I stick by what I said earlier. Having Tobin Bell being given the chance to act. To stretch out and show he is capable of doing more than the Jigsaw voice. Was great and very welcome. But even more so. You could tell he had fun with this. The man didn’t embrace his fate, he didn’t decide this was where he was stuck. He enjoys doing horror films. He’s done a few. He also was on daytime dramas. He’s just one of those few actors that is able to have fun , and not take things too seriously. But seeing him come back for this one, at his age, and add some depth to his character. Was great.

It was the one saving grace of the film honestly. It was also severely needed. I mean no one is never gonna not laugh when Jigsaw tells people he’s not a killer, he doesn’t murder people. But having a story that actually, legitimizes what he was doing in the first few films(well directly doing) It’s nice. Even if it doesn’t really…REALLY legitimize it. Because yeah he’s already been killing people. But it does give him that sort of. Hannibal like vibe.

He's a monster, and these people picked the wrong man to screw over. Even Cecilia admitted that when she gloated in front of John. She was legitimately scared when she realized who John was. It’s a nice touch and the story really adds to his character, I don’t know that we need another, though with what the film made it absolutely is likely to get another. But this would be a good send off for John once and for all. Tobin did great.

The other actors. Well. It’s a SAW film, and they all knew how to scream, shout, and look evil. But to be fair. There wasn’t as much for them, as it wasn’t their story really. It would’ve been nice getting a bit more on Cecilia. But it still wasn’t needed. We knew enough. These were bad people. They needed to die.

As a film on its own? It’s entertaining and a good revenge film. Had you not seen the other SAW movies? It’d still be entertaining.

Even with the horrible early 2000’s editing from the first few films they decided to bring back. I guess they went full prequel mode.

As a SAW film it’s better in that it has a good story for once. Impressive effects, and even with the laughing. Was still entertaining. However I did mention while it says a lot, it also says a little. That’s because of SPIRAL.

SPIRAL was SAW 9. It starred Chris Rock. The film was. Well it had some interesting bits, and the traps were. Okay. The traps were questionable, and they weren’t meant to be escaped. They were meant for killing. The movie was just bland. Chris Rock was meh in the film, though he seemed to think otherwise. But overall the movie didn’t leave much impact. It also didn’t add anything. It was titled SPIRAL: From the Book of Saw. It was meant more or less as an off shoot. Like the Hobbs movie in Fast and Furious. A way to branch out the series and use other, knew characters. Sort of like GHOST CORPS was meant to branch out new groups in the Ghostbusters franchise.

Only both failed, and no one had any interest.

So it was back to the source material. For both films.

So given what SAW 10 had to beat with the last entry in the series? That wasn’t exactly a hard task. Hellraiser suffered the same fate with a lot of its terrible, bad, and just sad entries.

But knowing they cared to actually make a story with this, helped a lot. That and bringing in a lot of familiar faces. Not just Tobin Grace, Shawnee Smith, or Costas Mandylor as returning characters John, Amanda, and Hoffman. But also the director and writers.

The director also directed 3 of the SAW films, he also edited damn near all of them as well. The writers funnily enough. Both wrote 3 other saw films. Including SPIRAL.

So the idea they came up with a better story this time around versus the 9th installment? Wow.

It was a reuniting of former team members. They pulled it together, and managed to play out an entertaining entry in the series. What should be a good send off and bookend to Jigsaw, should stay as such. But when things make a shit ton of money. Sequels always abound. I just don’t know how believable more prequels could be. But, only time will tell.

The effects as always were great and bloody. Over the top traps, even if they made little sense and defied logic. They were still fun, they fed that need only a SAW film can provide.

It was also refreshing for once to see a SAW film take place in well lit locations. I mean holy shit the sun actually was allowed to star in this movie. Which thanks to that, gave us the great park bench scene. Which still has me laughing.

I mean seriously, you have a second chance at life, you could rethink things, do something with this second chance. But the guy is just all smiles planning out more murders. It’s great and funny as hell.

I can’t hate this movie. Even if its not the best thing ever. It’s just a SAW film, and that’s all it had to be.

Absolutely you should check it out, rent it, buy it. Hell watch all 10 SAW films. Make a weekend of it. I don’t know if I would review all 10 of them, but I know it’d be fun if I did. Maybe an idea for another time.

But for now. Yes. Highly recommend it, and I’m glad I saved it to close out this month.

This was a really tough month, for a lot of reasons.

Between my Aunt and her bad health, and eventually her own passing. Dealing with my moms health as well, missing huge chunks of work so I could do whatever was needed around the house to help her, to run the house and take care of business and errands for my mom. My computer breaking down. Being replaced twice and taking a month total to get fixed.

It was a hard time. I am looking forward to having a break now.

God, I had planned two more months of movies, and there were going to be audio reviews this month as well. But life happens, I was playing catchup a lot of times, Doing two of these a night, sometimes starting a third before the next night. Was not a fun time. But I stuck with it. I did it, and we ended another year with a month of horror for October.

Again I thank any and everyone who stuck with this, liked it, reviewed it. Even glanced at it.

I’ve said it before and I’ll always say it. Whether no one reads these, one person reads them, or a hundred of you read them. I’ll always keep doing them. Because I love movies, I love writing about them, and when I see comments here, when I get invited to do podcast with other people, or they mention what I wrote. It always makes me happy, and it makes it feel worth it. I love doing this.

Even if I lose my sanity every horrible film that we discover. I may not have died for your sins, But I did watch Ex…you know.

You know.

Thank you for another month, and I look forward to the next planned theme of reviews sometime soon. Take care, have fun. Enjoy some movies, and until next time. If you find yourself in a Jigsaw trap, how about you don’t panic. Calm down, look around the room, not trigger the timer or anything else until you’ve examined your surroundings and options. Do this, and you’ll have done 85% better than anyone else and you just might make it out alive. Seriously if you ever have to break 5 of your fingers or all of them? Treat it like the strand of anal beads in your lovers backside. Grip it and rip that cord like your starting a lawnmower. GOODNIGHT!!