Found Footage February Day 15 The Borderlands aka The Final Prayer!!

Day 15

The Borderlands/Final Prayer

So this film, gave me a lot of déjà vu.

Looking at the synopsis it says “investigators travel to an isolated church after hearing reports of bizarre happening taking place there.”

Which REALLY sounded a lot like another film we already watched for this month involving nuns, the devil and the irish.

This too involves the irish-ish. And focuses on a miracle, of sorts so. I had to ponder a bit there. Then I saw the film was released under different names. So AGAIN I had to wonder did I see this? Was it under a different name?

What is going on here?! Is everyone taking crazy pills?!?!

Apparently not as this is indeed VERY much a different film, and we shall hope an equally good if not better experience. This film was recommended and I would say it looks like an adventure. The poster art gives absolutely nothing away, and when I asked anything about the film and their take on it, I was chuckled at and told “Hah no…nuh uh. No. Watch it”

SO we will see how this goes.

There is hope, but there is also that very real possibility that when I recommend films to people and they end up absolutely hating them because they did NOT take me seriously when I said ‘this is the funniest piece of shit I’ve ever witnessed, it will haunt you’, it’s not really my fault? But it IS the fault of anyone not fully taking to heart what I said and how I said it.

…let’s dive on in.

The film

What better way to open a film, than with footage recorded by police. Going through a church building, discovering hidden speaker systems, talking about disappearing priest, and a very angry priest on his cellphone politely directing us to feck off. Curious about that one myself and sure we will find out later, or soon. Who knows with these things! Just file it and put a flag on it.

Because this angry priest is coming back!

Not from the dead, but he’s walking through the doorway of another characters home as he was doing a camera and equipment check. I suppose giving names to these men would help instead of grumpy face and Tosh 2.0.

Well our man with a bed full of sexy cameras, microphones and equipment is Gray. He’s not a super religious man but he’s happy to have a job it seems, which we can assume as he’s part of this investigative team, that he’s our tech man and will be aiding our priest in his investigation. Sir Grumpy Face McPriesty, Is actually Deacon. He’s a very tired, not enjoying being here let alone with this guys energy in the room. Gray is a bit wired because the man lives off red bull, which while it slowly kills his liver, it helps him to race face first into the hairy armpit of life with full energy. Deacon looks like he’s fueled by a nice proper scotch.

I like these two. It’s funny because it’s less than 3 minutes but these two have a fun spark. We will hope the best for them.

Even though things are not starting on the best foot for them. Gray wants to get down to work, have a beer and chill out, Deacon just wants some hot tea and a bed to pass out in.  Which I can highly relate with as I’ve only had 4 hours sleep and tea always sounds amazing, but bed even more so.

So the film is introducing us to just how this is all going to be captured and filmed for us. Gray is prepping Deacon on all the gear he has, how it works and more importantly how they will be expected to work together. Which starts with the biggest headache I could imagine having. They are required to wear headcams throughout and the time they are sharing in a very lovely little cottage is going to be spent getting used to wearing the gear. So, every morning, right when they wake. They are supposed to put on their headsets and begin recording.

Why? Don’t know.

But this is the job. And Deacon has to get to the point it becomes second nature as the church is wanting them to record everything. Even their nice cottage has camera setup through the hallways and rooms. For what purpose? Given Gray and his constant tech exercising, it’d be a safe bet to assume he’s testing the equipment around the house before hooking it up to their site.

Which, why the hell are we not there yet? Well we need our second priest of course. Mark.

Once Mark arrives, our party can head up to the site of investigation and begin…investigating. Obviously.

More importantly I don’t care if we get to the site yet or not. I mean I kind of do. But at the same time, watching these two go shopping, and Gray buying nothing but snack food, and Deacon purchasing nothing but wine. This is gonna be great.

Even better and something I am sure we will get into later, is Deacon though a priest, is apparently a practicing Buddhist. He also has little to no hope what so ever of there being an actual miracle here.

This is again sounding very familiar with our last film with two men discussing faith and lack of belief. Only as much as I enjoyed those conversations between the characters. These two seem a good deal more interesting and if we are to follow them around a majority of this film. Then I’m glad they work well off one another.

But we can’t have a movie of just talking. Talking pictures? WHO HEARD OF THAT!!

So even though or main priest in charge…Mark. Hasn’t arrived yet. Deacon is running short on patience and possibly alcohol, so he wants to head up and begin investigating. Setting up the equipment and get the ball rolling so he can go back wherever he was before. The man has no hope of a miracle being found and much like the last priest encountering a miracle. He’s just about done with all of it and the church it would seem. Hopefully for different reasons as it would suck to have this film go that route all over again.

They definitely are giving us a few things to latch onto but nothing solid. I know it’s a bit early to be looking around but you can never tell.

Though we are getting a glimpse of some sort of, miracle? I guess? I mean it all depends on your view of a miracle. Like for instance here.

While a priest is baptizing a baby, as he recites the words. There’s a sudden and violent shaking throughout the church. No earthquake mind you. Just the building itself. A cross and chalice tumble from an alter and our local priest is decreeing this a miracle!

Honestly if I put on my plumbers outfit and took a look at this situation I’d have to nod and tell them, ‘Looks like you got demons’, because reciting scripture in a church should not cause the building to rumble jumble and shake its butt on the dance floor. It should be happy rejoicing and beaming light into the place. Right?

Well again, our views on a miracle might differ. It certainly does for our pair here.

As they were able to record the event and the priest very happy reaction, it would seem to Gray we have reason to celebrate. Not Deacon so much. He’s willing to celebrate a drink at the pub, but not this.

With the group having successfully setup their cameras all around the place, they are ready to capture any further miracles. Which means its time to grant Deacon his miracle and take off to the pub for a discussion on what they witnessed.

Whether he wants to or not.

Of course Gray is all about what just happened and he’s blown away by it. For him this was a miracle. It was an event they captured and he’s watched it 50 times and he still can’t believe it, even though he was there for it.

Deacon on the other hand, enjoys the kids latching onto one thing as a miracle, but he’s not swayed. Not just because he seems a bit jaded in the faith. But because he’s done this so long apparently, that he’s already figuring how it could’ve been done, and he knows how the church acts on these things. Which surprises Gray.

He tells Gray that the church very rarely ever calls something a miracle. Even what they saw and captured. If they can prove it wasn’t a trick, the higher ups could still decide it’s not a miracle, just a random event and that’d be the end of it. He uses this also as a subtle reminder to Gray that, their job is not to play detective. They are simply told by the church to go, investigate, gather evidence and data. Turn it over to the church and move on to the next job. That simple.

But it just sucks the air out of the balloon for Gray. Which makes sense when you are expecting the most religious of religious people to see something unexplained and call it a miracle. But nope! They are men of science, of the lord. The lords science.

It’s honestly pretty fun and a nice bonding scene for the priest and tech guy. It’s a different dynamic than the previous film where we instead of a broken priest talking to a true believer, have a semi skeptic who’s willing to believe anything he sees with his own eyes over scripture, and a priest who seems to have been shelved by other priest and resigned himself to a task that doesn’t require his faith. Honestly the guy just seems to want to be left alone.

It's just nice because seeing these two at a bar together having drinks and talking. You can tell they’d have discussions on deep subjects together but never cross one another. Deacon isn’t bashing him for believing anything that happened, he’s just asking him to not dive in so quickly, while backing up his own case. At one point Gray brings up another miracle he’d heard about in the papers, in Spain where a girl was experiencing Stigmata, and he told Deacon there’s no way you can fake open wounds on your hands and feet. But Deacon informs him that he was there for that investigation, they’d discovered the girl had gotten sick, Septicemia. Her mother for ten weeks, every day. Would cut her daughters hands and feet open. Eventually her daughter died from the sickness, and when she did the mother declared to Deacon that ‘Now, you can make my daughter a saint.’. Which, yeah. That’s pretty damn harsh man. But unfortunately yeah you can see, and know there are people that messed up out there. It’s sad to hear but a good point to make his case that again, not all miracles are miracles, just desperate people doing desperate things.

But now is not the time for chat! Now is the time for furthering our story and, well you’ll see.

As our pair make their way home, they unfortunately run into the main in charge of this investigation. Mark.  Mark is the very embodiment of prideful self masturbatory ego.  The man loves not only being in charge, but having and lording power over others. I mean the guy isn’t a power hungry vacuum. He’s just very up tight, by the book and seems to enjoy poking daggers at Deacon and twisting them for some reason.

I mean how would you feel coming home and finding your team leader upset you went off without them and then dangling your own sacred objects in front of you mocking your lack of faith. Guy’s a dickweed. But he is definitely serving his purpose.

So with that, we begin our research and investigation properly. Deacon is nose deep in paperwork and diaries from the church, dating all the way back to the 1800’s where we find a priest, the last to serve there until recently, had opened an orphanage beside the church and discussed his take on the towns people which was not all that pleasant, for some reason.

We also learn that not everyone eats fish and chips with vinegar thankfully, but also with tartar sauce which makes me feel all the better, and we also learn that when sheep are on fire they make the most unholy sound you’ll ever hear in your life next to a rabbit in pain.

Oh wait there’s a sheep on fire.

THERE’S A SHEEP ON FIRE?!!

Why yes there is, screaming through the priest dinner is a flaming running for its short remaining life sheep. Which Deacon is able to extinguish the fire of, but still the poor thing is dead, and thankfully no longer suffering. Was it the work of weekend satanist? The devil? Or the irish mafia?! Who can say. We can’t because, we don’t know. Yeah. Yeah….

So mornings start early and man are they hard to get up for. But we have our team at full force and Mark only rest on Sunday. So everyone must be out the door and good to go. Grab your red bull and scotch. Its investigation time.

Which thank goodness for. Because it somehow manages to make Mike look a little less like a wormy I’ll stab you in the back on basic principle guy, and he actually looks well, like he should. Him and Deacon are not only getting along for the job, they are both on the same page of ‘dis is bullshit’ apparently. Which makes Gray even more the odd man out as he thinks both these priest are nucking futs for not seeing this for the miracle that it is.

Once they review the footage, Deacon has an idea how the miracle they saw happened and Mike agrees with him. They believe the sudden vibrations were caused by speakers hidden somewhere, the subwoofer reverb causing the items to move jump and fall over, but more interestingly is how Mike says to Deacon “You’re saying its speakers again?” and Deacon quickly cuts him off with a “yes”, this seems to be tying back to the beginning and what we glimpsed of a very upset Deacon and the church they were at having speakers dug out from the walls and behind bricks connected to a large audio system.

So whatever happened there we can rest assured was not good, and gave Deacon some bad history with the church. NOW we are getting good character stuff. Thank you movie.

I’m not at all bitching, I am digging this, I like the vibe, I like the characters, they all seem like they are a good group dynamic and the story is getting itself moving. But still slowly enough to keep us guessing what’s really at play and, I still doubt a shaking table is exactly a miracle and wait for an ACTUAL something to happen. This feels like a slow burn story and given we have a full hour left to go, I’m gonna say bring it on, you got me interested.

I like the little bits being laid out of the antagonizing between Mike and Deacon, I like that it hints at something more being there and Gray still being the odd one out, but at the same time, he’s got one friend. Who just happens to be the most un priestly like priest.

It’s good stuff.

There’s also some mild creepiness popping up as well.

We have a priest belonging to the church hearing creepy baby cries from within the church, which. Should not be. We have Gray on his phone and losing signal both with his phone and on his headset. The video gets our favorite friend to pop up, Mr. Static video. Classic signs of demons!

Also, and this was a pretty subtle trick I have to give them props for. I had to rewind to make sure what I saw to make sure it wasn’t just me hoping for something. Gray is wondering through the nearby ancient cemetery of the church, commenting on peoples lifespans and as he goes to light his freshly rolled cigarette, if you look at this very old gravestone in front of him, You see his name on the gravestone, now just that but his birthday and year of his death. Which just so happens to be when the film takes place. BUT!, the moment he gets startled by a bird and looks away, then back down to light his smokie treat, the name and date have changed.

BRING ON THE CREEPY SHIT!!!

Well aside smoking and ignoring a grave that displays his name and death date, Gray is also investigating something. He’s hearing odd whispers. Some deep noise coming from, of all things one of the stone coffins outside the church. When he goes to investigate however the sound ends and a large dog borks, scaring the piss right out of his body, sending him to the ground screaming bloody murder. Hearing his semi good friend in despair, Deakon runs off to check on him.

Meanwhile Mike is investigating an odd repeating breeze from somewhere. He notices the plastic paint sheet flapping and decides to take a peak. As he does, we make out(albeit barely) what looks like a dark passage in the ground. As he gets a bit further in he suddenly gets knocked back by a…well I can’t say really. It’s like a mixed growl and gust of wind. It’s knocked the priest back and he’s now bleeding out one ear. Which is, perfectly normal. I’m sure.

Well it must be, because it doesn’t seem to effect Mark. He just assumes he must’ve ruptured his ear drum on the flight…yesterday. And is just now bleeding out his ear because. Of course.

With that Mark is off to bed and the two guys we really care about are left to have a drink and get to know each other a little more.

Again it’s a nice chemistry these two have and I’m glad for it. Deacon seems to genuinely like Gray, even though he can be a bit much to handle, and the guy just seems most the time to be off in his own world. So why in the world is Gray here working with the church? Well that’s Deacon’s question for him. Apparently they were looking to hire a technical expert, he saw the job posting and when he went to them about it, they asked if he was a believer and he gave the honest Ernie Hudson answer “If there’s a paycheck involved? I’ll believe anything.”

Which amuses the hell out of Deacon. The guy lied to the church for a paycheck, and now he’s believing he’s witness to a miracle. He doesn’t give him shit for it and Gray is glad to find he was right about Deacon that the guy is indeed someone he could, can and does share a beer with. But…

BUT.

He also wants to know more about him and what seems to be the pentacle of him and the church having issues, which links us back to the first video clip we saw in the film. He’s asking Deacon to tell him about what happened in, Belem.

With a LOT of hesitation, Deakon finally opens his beer and decides why not,

There was a shrine that was getting a reputation as a healing shrine, lines of people were showing up waiting to be healed.

One of the churchs Cardinals went to investigate himself and after a few days of their having been there and investigating with 2 other priest. The church grew concerned. They were receiving reports that weren’t making much sense from the Cardinal and he reported people weren’t just being healed. They were seeing God. To make things worse, they stopped receiving reports eventually and it was reported back to the Vatican that, the three priest including their high ranking Cardinal went missing.

A few days later their bodies were found in the woods. An autopsy was done and all three men were found with traces of Dimethyltryptamine. Apparently the local shaman was using this with the shrine and it was causing the people to hallucinate, at least it’s displayed as a possibility. Apparently the three men took this DMT and, had a bad reaction resulting in their deaths. Deacon tells us the locals must have freaked out and hid their bodies in the woods. So. Either they died from DMT poisoning, or, there’s always the possibility they saw God and, well yeah.

Deacon is trying to get a point across to Gray, while sharing what sounds like a traumatic event which Deacon was called down to investigate and discovered what had happened. He ends it with a lesson for Gray, don’t believe everything you see. Which he tops off with a coin trick of seeming to pop a coin into an empty beer bottle in Gray’s hand, leaving the man wondering how the hell he just did this.

TRULY ANOTHER MIRACLE!!!

The fact they stopped after one beer is truly a miracle in itself.

So we need something to counter this nice chat, the film is amping up the spooky stuff and thank the maker.

We find Father Crellick, the local priest of the miracle church, kneeling and praying before turning in for the night. And as he prays we once again begin to hear the distant soft cries of children, mixed in with whispers and groaning walls. Soon we start getting what’s best described as demons getting pissy about the priest praying.

The video recordings begin going wiggly wobbly. The sounds grow from faint to loud, soon there is banging and rattling. Things are shaking and moving and our priest is checking the hell out. Rightfully so.

We will safely assume that he survived the night and did not end up shitting himself in fear and crying through the night.

As if that wasn’t enough, how about some old time scares! Deacon is reading a passage from the diary he felt was, well we’ll say worth mentioning. “More cages. Sick to my core. The dreams drew me here. Perhaps always him. I beseech you, reader, leave this place. This village, a painted façade. He lies beneath, ever hungrier for souls. Now I see the perfect, hideous logic of the orphanage. I may have a new master now.”

I’m not scientist, or historian, unless we are discussing 70’s porn. But back on point. I may not be a historian but this sounds like a WHOLE lot to worry about. Especially when THAT is your priest last entry from a journal back from the 1800’s, the last time a priest ever set foot inside that church and served for the town, until now. Which just so happens to coincide with these miracles suddenly happening. What’s more interesting though, is the fact that Deacon is starting to get invested in this now. He’s not sure what all to make from the journal, but for the priest who wrote it to have gone from a hopeful man willing to give this town a try that he’d been directed to preach too, for him to go from that to talking about a lurking evil hungering for souls and in the end abandoning god. There’s some serious shit going on here. What’s more is he believes it wasn’t an accident that the journal was found in the churches records. He believes the local priest Father Crellick put it there for them to find, like he wanted them to make sense of it and discover something within it that he can’t tell them, or perhaps needs them to confirm. It’s a bit unsure, and sadly. It’s not going to become much clearer.

As the men make their way to the church for day 2 of the investigation. They find Crellick sobbing , sat at one of the pews. He tells them he heard the sounds again last night, and the whispers. He’s beginning to believe what’s happening there, may actually not be a miracle. But something more. He can see the men don’t seem to believe him or think he’s just losing it, so he quietly leaves and Deacon along side Gray begin their sound test.

All the equipment that Gray has setup is going to monitor, record and hopefully pinpoint any noises, any movement what so ever within the walls and structure of the church.

Does it work? Sort of.

In a good way? Absolutely fucking not.

Within moments we are capturing and tracking scratching noises coming from within the walls of the church. On top of that? We are getting crying babies again. I swear this is two different movies,  there is noooo WAY. They copied the exact same plot of the previous priest investigation film. Granted that’d be a hell of a thing, and I’d be the first to flip a table over it. But lets wait and see. As long as we don’t find out the church was sacrificing babies in some satanic ritual waiting for the devil to bring them the antichrist. We’ll be good.

But I promise you. Tables will be flipped if we do!!

As we hear the cries of an unseen child, and the walls are filling with clawing and scratching, Mark has a simple explanation as we are tracking and hearing this with the amplification of the speaker and equipment Gray setup. Obviously this is feedback from a nearby baby monitor crossing signals with their equipment. OBVIOUSLY.

However it seems demons or something wishes to state that they disagree with that, as the noises intensify and once again. We see the alter shaking and vibrating violently. Enough that the cross atop it goes tumbling once more. But something else has caught their attention. More specifically Deacon’s. He’s spotted father Crellick by the window outside, directly behind the alter. Moments after spotting the priest, he takes off running. Deacon alerts the others and Mark volunteers to go outside and look for him. He and Deacon are now assuming the priest was caught faking this. Claiming it was possible he could have been manipulating the cross and such on the alter with fishing wire outside the window which….is a real stretch but alright, why not. So Mark takes off and Deacon hangs out with Gray, turning off the equipment and telling him how they very well could end up at the end of their investigation now, once Mark talks to the priest and perhaps gets him to confess.

If only it were that simple.

Within the church Deacon and Gray are hearing the return of the growling and clawing, along with the echoes once more of a baby crying. Deacon hearing this, begins to admit to Gray that Mark might be right, it makes sense what he said about them picking up or crossing waves with a baby monitor. Only Gray has news for him. That would absolutely be plausible, if their equipment was still on. But it’s not. None of it is. Everything they’re hearing is happening in real time and without amplification.

Meanwhile, Mark has caught up with our resident priest. Who really did take a nice lengthy run from that window. The man ended up running to the back of the church, up a large stairway AND ladder up a tower to its very roof. Where he stands looking out over the land. Mark is immediately alarmed and tries asking Crellick to come back down with him, that they aren’t here to harm him or expose him. They just want his help. But Crellick is gone, the man is having a conversation Mark is not on the same page for. He comes to the scary realization as he talks to Mark that. If this miracle, is not from God’s own hand, then they need to run.

With that, Father Crellick flings himself from the roof of the tower, to his death.

Now the police are on their way, Mark is dealing with them and telling them what happened, and. Well this very well may BE the end of the investigation. Gray is extremely shaken up over this, and Deacon does his best to help the man out. By doing the one thing he knows best. Right. Back to the pub!

So the two are sharing drinks, or rather Gray is watching Deacon uncharacteristically pound back three full glasses of wine in one go each. Obviously the actions of a man holding it all together. Gray can’t help but let it all out. That he can’t believe Deacon would be on the same page with Mark, that father Creillick committed suicide, because of pressure he was under for faking a miracle, to try and revive the towns faith in attending his church by declaring a miracle took place there.

It's a mortal sin according to Catholics for someone to commit suicide. Doing so earns you a trip to the bad place. All priest know this. So Gray’s problem is, if Crellick was so devout and such a good priest. Why would he commit a mortal sin damning himself to hell? He feels it can’t just be because they might have discovered he was faking something, there has to be more to it. I like his reasoning and the film running with it, it’s a good thought honestly. If a priest was so scared of something, or convinced if what he'd been praising to be a miracle of god, but wasn’t. Why would they suddenly throw themselves from a tower to their death, knowing it was the highest sin they could commit, damning themselves to hell?

But Deacon has no answers, just that priest struggle. Not all of them are good. They’re human, they make mistakes, they also sin, the man did what he did and only he knows why he did it. But Gray persist, he knows Deacon is thinking the same as he is. That he isn’t like Mark and he really does feel there’s more to it. Ultimately this leads into a topic I was rather surprised they went into, but am happy they did. The film really is pulling itself on the scale with balancing characters and story with their demon story and it’s great.  Gray is going on to Deacon about how, the first people there in the town. Were Pegan, That those people worshipped the sun, the moon, stars. They worshipped physical things that were actually around them. But Catholics, Christianity. Their whole belief is around the ‘what if’ factor. There is nothing to prove what they believe in and worship is real let alone existed. For him if those two things were to duke it out one night in a bar, or a church. It’d be a losing battle to bet on the thing that you can’t see and doesn’t seem to exist past a what if, versus betting on the thing you physically can see is there. It’s a good and well, kinda gun powder lined topic to get into but it’d be an interesting one to hear them get into.

Only we won’t be. The town is mad they’ve lost a good man, and they no longer seem to be welcoming the three men into their town anymore. Blaming them now for the mans death. Deacon asked for another drink, but the pub owner decided they were done serving drinks. At least to him and Gray. Deacon is getting ready for a fight but Gray is kindly pulling his friend out the door and away from possible casualties. Though I would’ve paid 20 bucks to hear Deacon say “I kick ass for the lord!” God I love Dead Alive.

We miss those films Peter Jackson, bring them back.

Anyway.

Deacon has lost his control. He’s absolutely far from okay and nowhere near as accepting and calm as he was trying to come off. He’s letting Gray know that now. Yes he doesn’t accept what happened. Yes it upsets him, and even more so. It truly gets under his skin, this feeling that now with the man having taken his own life. This entire investigation. The diary entries, the unexplained noises all of it, are going to be swept under the rug by the church. A cover up like they’ve done many times before and he doesn’t want to see it happen. Not after this. So his plan? Is to go back up to the church. The only trouble, is to convince Mark on doing this.

Which Mark is not going to allow. For him this is all done and over with. There is no need to investigate further, it’s all the actions of a depressed priest, nothing more or less. With that Mark puts an end to the discussion and is off to bed, telling the others to clean up and get ready to leave tomorrow. But Deacon is fueled by the fires of truth and half a bottle of wine. So he’s not sleeping. He’s going out to the church to investigate.

Which not only is it the bravest, stupidest thing he could do. It’s also the only thing someone full of liquid courage would think to do, and later seriously regret.

I mean seriously, you would not, at least I would think most of you would not be insane enough to say fuck it let’s go investigate a hell gate church where a priest just committed suicide and babies as well as demons seem to be clawing at the walls and crying out. Sure sounds like an average Sunday not, go for it. Yolo and all that shit.

But off Deacon goes. In the dead of night. It really reminded me a lot of the scene in Jaws where Hooper and Brodey take off in Hooper’s boat to go looking for the shark and come across the nearly destroyed boat and find the tooth of a great white. He’s marching out in the field with a flashlight, singing quietly to himself, and suddenly begins hearing noises. Not only that, but we through his headset catch glimpses of what appears to be, well. A very much alive father Crellik. Wearing the same robe he died in. On top of that, we are also hearing Crellik whispering to Deacon. Eventually Deacon finds himself of all places, right at the place of the father’s suidice, only to hear a loud whisper, look upward and sure enough there the priest stands in his robes. Before a loud noise strikes and a thud follows. Deacon rounds the corner and…we find the white robe of our recently deceased priest on the ground, As Deacon goes to investigate it further, he lifts the robe and finds the entire thing is full of worms. Just mountains and stacks of wriggling worms. Which is just, lovely. Is it enough to send Deacon back home? Hell no! That man is a Scotsman fueled by grain alcohol and fermented grape juice. He’s just getting started.

So into the church of demonic wonder our brave man goes. And right away he is greeted by whispers again of the recently dead priest, but more then that, he’s also getting the baby crying but it sounds very different. Even the whispering from the dead priest sound odd.

Like before the baby crying would come out very clear and audibly. But now it sounds distorted, wobbly almost, and Crellick’s whispers almost sound like his whispered prayers he used to say every night in the main room of the church. Deacon is on a mission to uncover the source of this. Either he’ll find the hidden speaker providing this, or he’ll find proof of something beyond that. So the man begins taring down bookshelves. He can hear the cries coming from behind one of them. Which just so happens to be the same bookshelf by the opening in the wall that Mark had found when he got knocked back and his ears bled.

Deacon has thoroughly fucked the bookcase wall up enough to uncover a passage behind it. Great Ceaser’s Toast! He found a secret passage! So of course we have to investigate it, because who cares about survival at this point. I mean you only saw physical manifestations of a priest who killed himself earlier that day AND you hear demonic noises on top of a child crying. Sure just barrel on down right in there and go for it.

Needless to say even with booze in his system, Deacon is even beginning to sober up and realize this may not have been the best decision and we all should be agreeing with him. Especially once he spots a carved staircase leading further down and immediately laid out on one of the steps, is the decaying body of a small child. At the moment of its discovery of course, naturally. We get more Creepy whispers and this time, Father Crellick whispers more clearly about a Father Frazzetti. “Father Frazzetti! Father Frazzetti’s eyes!” and with that, Deacon has lost all his nerves and we hear another loud guttural growl, followed by the ringing of the church bells. Deacon is out of that place in record time and we find him back in the cottage they are all sharing, and calling the Vatican.

You can imagine Mark is happy about this, and the fact Deacon has personally told the higher ups what he saw, what they found, and they are sending out Father Umberto Calvino. The big guns of the Vatican. He’s an expert in church history, if anything has happened that the church would like to forget about or never have mentioned again? He knows about it. So we are bringing the best secret historian on the church to help investigate things.

Thankfully. And I do mean thankfully, because this really bugged me with the other film similar to this. Deacon is ACTUALLY playing back for all of them what he saw on his headset. What he saw. What he heard. So none of them can call him out as lying about it. But sure enough mark does, “You could’ve been saying those things, we never see your face so it could be you.”, it’s a fair point but also fuck you.

Gray thankfully is the one to bring up a good question, which is what is all this about Frazzetti’s eyes? Why does it freak Deacon out that this spirit would mention that.

Well things are taking a turn and not really for the better. Calvino is the one to tell Gray that, Frazzetti was part of the investigation group of priest that went to look into the miracle of the healing shrine Deacon told him about. Only Deacon failed to mention that he didn’t arrive too late. He was with the group. He was tasked with the job of bringing the priest back to the church.

But according to Mark, Deacon was meddling with the investigation. He believed they should investigate further, so the three priest did. However once it was discovered they had uncovered the hoax? The people that did the hoax killed the other priest. Deacon was only spared because he was drunk at a pub that night and escaped the massacre.

As for Frazzetti’s eyes goes? He did partake in the healing shrine and DMT, he did have visions. He told no one about what he saw, but what he saw was too much for him to handle, so he took out his own eyes.

Well all of this just. Keeps getting better and better.

Unfortunately though it has caused a bit of a rift between Deacon and Gray. Gray hearing now the full truth of what happened versus the version that Deacon told him, it’s hurt him and the guy feels betrayed by a man he saw as his friend. So, now they won’t be sending Christmas cards likely. Which is unfortunate as I really liked their dynamic. BUT. We are entering the final act of our film so.

But before we can dive on into the last action of the film. We need a pep talk, or something. We didn’t just wheel out Calvino just to give a popes wave then fly off. He’s got a story to share. We are going to hear about Mellitus, a man sent by Gregory on the mission to bring Christianity to the Pagans of England. Apparently we are going to be getting some more under the rug history, So our new party member decides to slap down a letter from Gregory sent to the Mellitus. “By no means destroy the temples of the heathen gods. But rather the idols that are within those temples. When you have purified them with holy water, place alters there.”

With that, we are finally told the story of the church they’d been investigating. That the site the church was built upon, used to be a pagan place of worship, and of great significance to the Pagans. Whether it was demons or an evil spirit, the church came and drove it out. They called it the antichrist-

I am gripping the edges of the table, I am ready to flip it, but I am restraining myself.

As well we all should. Because he THANKFULLY adds that they church did not know ‘what’ to call it. It being the thing they removed. But whatever ‘it’ was, it has apparently returned, and they must do as their ancestors of the church did. Drive the evil out and sanctify the grounds. Only then will this evil presence leave the church for good and all.

Now. Now we are headed for a final battle. And I am okay with it. I’m just glad we have no nuns selling babies and killing others, no antichrist being delivered. Just the sincere hopes that we will not see a town of cultist like Hot Fuzz and find them trying to bring back the antichrist by sacrificing children, or resurrecting fucking Rawhead Rex.

Remember that movie? That was a great film.

So now we have our four men making way to the church in a super awkward drive. A drive made awkward by Gray as he is still very shook by Deacon lying to him about his part in that story and he wants Deacon to KNOW he is upset about it. Poor Deacon even tries to apologize and explain himself and why he did that, but Gray doesn’t want to hear it.

Things are scarily starting to stack up as they begin setting up lights and prepare the church for a ritual. By stacking up, I mean there is a distinct callback to a symbol father Calvino has uncovered on the ground. It’s the very same symbol from the 1800’s journal, and as Calvino tells us, it’s a common symbol in Pagan rituals. The sigil represents the deity of the people who were here. So which deity did they worship? Don’t know. With all the time and history gone by, lost records and forgotten times. They have no idea what or who, “Even the name of this Pagan God eludes us.”

This is just shaping up to be a great day.

But that symbol is all they require, for the banishing ceremony to begin.

One last time for our three original group members to have it out with one another. As father Calvino performs the ritual, Gray is questioning Mark on how he can explain the baby crying that they all heard, even the former friend whom he’s no longer talking to had heard. He tries explaining that it could be caused by changes in frequencies in caves that can give off sounds that sound like things, more specifically he says they can come off as sounding almost static like or recorded. Which…is a bit concerning as that’s just how the baby crying sounded when Deacon was in there and close to the walkway down under the church.

Ferric Oxide may be the scientific answer Mark has found for the recreation of what sounded like baby cries, and potentially the deceased priest whispers. But its not good enough for Gray, and especially not for Deacon. Who is stepping up to debate Mark now. Not just debate but out right have it out with the man. He is questioning Mark’s faith, which is opening a whole can of worms I am sure father Calvino is really happy to be having during a ceremony to force evil out.

To no ones surprise we learn that Mark, even as a high ranking official in the church, does not in fact believe in not only miracles, but any of the churches stories. He believe in science. He is a catholic, but he only believes that which is real, not the magical events or miracles in the bible or elsewhere, This is why he clashes so much with Deacon and holds him responsible for the deaths of those priest. Had he just accepted the facts as they were found they would be alive. But instead he urged them to go off of faith and investigate further. Only to lead to their deaths. Which I mean no one is going to say it, but here they are again, investigating and now performing a ritual because this man’s faith tells him there is something there.

But no one needs to say it, as whatever the hell it is in the church is going to say it for them. Yep. All the lights blow out and burst, cameras are going wonky wobbly wiggle woo, and things are really rocking and rolling now.

You better had watched the movie because if you look away for even a second, you missed a hell of a lot. A HELL of a lot.

We see what looks like shadows reach out or SOMETHING reach for Gray and he trips. A quick glance at Calvino and we see blood running from his eyes. In the madness we can hear Father Crellick crying out at the men “GET OUT! RUN AWAY!” he repeats this along with deep growls and rumbles and. Just as suddenly as things went haywire. They are back to silence now. Mark is seen on the ground unmoving. His ears are bleeding heavily, and father Calvino is nowhere to be found. Only a few trails of blood remain from where the priest stood.

Gray believed the man took off down the path behind the bookcase, so Deacon is going after him. Finding the door tightly sealed, but he fights it free with all of his strength. He is not going to lose anyone this time. Gray soon finding himself alone and even scarier, Mark now missing. Decides it’s best to get the fuck out of there and seek his former friend Deacon. The two reunite underneath the church and begin searching for Calvino. Mark, not so much. But that’s highly understandable. Super understandable.

What’s growing more and more alarming, and even has Gray worried to the point his soul wants to leave his body, is the fact we no longer hear the growing, or baby crying. Instead it’s a steady low rhythmic rumble, and occasional screams of a priest somewhere.

But no seriously, that rumbling is, giving me ideas and I am back to having no fucking clue what to expect now. I have a theory but..I really don’t know.

As our duo travel deeper, and further down into this cave, under the hill of the church. They are discovering many dark and secret things. There are little wooden crates, empty of whatever creatures they carried, and scrawled out on the walls is the last words of our former church leader from the 1800’s, father Mandeville. “Please god, save them and forgive me. I have a new master now.”

What was he doing down there? Who knows, and likely best not to ask. However, I have not let up my grip on the table I am ready to flip. We have discovered a wall full of what look like cave drawings. And of course they al depict, child sacrifices, and thus a connection is made. The orphanage the priest had opened in the 1800’s was used by him, to sacrifice children to his new ‘master’ whatever the Pagan deity was that dwelled there. I mean I REALLY want to flip this table, but I don’t It’s just really closely mirroring the other film BUT. We still have no actual anti-christ or crazy child birthing so.

What we do have, is 5 minutes.

What we also have, is Father Mark!!

Yes! We are hearing Father Mark praying, and we see him but…this is not good!

Yes we see the bastard, but he keeps moving any time he is spotted…further drawing Deacon and Mark down into this labyrinth of tunnels. They even hear Father Calvino scream out at one point in pain but no idea where he is. But Gray is following Deacon and Deacon has found the path he saw Mark take.

And that’s when I saw it.

Holy fuck movie.

No, there is no antichrist, or nuns, or towns folk holding a ritual.

I actually had to pause the movie and go back because I had a “wait what the hell was….oh fuck.”

If you missed it, and kindly go back and pause the film at 1:27:03 exactly?

You’ll see it and shit yourself as well at the sudden realization of what is happening.

You clever fucking bastards. Seriously, you goddamn clever bastards.

All we’ve seen is a constant tunnel one after the other us dugout dirt and rocks, skulls and bones. They’ve crawled through these and traveled through these tunnels, ultimately ending up having to squeeze through a tunnel with what looks to be a light down within it.

This tunnel, at the time I marked. Has teeth.

These poor bastards literally were lured into and crawled right down into the mouth of an ancient and very real creature. Gray comments on horribly it smells inside there, how the ground feels wet, and suddenly Deacon realizes the way ahead is closed to them. So he tells Gray to push back and get them out. But Gray has discovered the way behind him has closed as well. They’ve wondered into the stomach of a creature, which is now secreting stomach acid and slowly dissolving them. Which. We get to see.

Gray is screaming out in pain and crying out to Deacon, about how he told him monsters, demons and devils were not real. They didn’t exist, and now here they were, in the belly of some very real ancient thing worshipped as a deity. We see large slimy globs of stomach acid pour over Gray as he begins to melt away screaming in agony, and Deacon holds his friends hand tightly, while he gives them both the last rites.

And that is where our film ends. With these two men, realizing they crawled literally into the belly of the beast, lured in by its visions and mock cries to their very slow and very painful death.

Fucking hell.

Good night!

The End

Seriously that. Wow…fuck.

Of all things I was expecting, that was the one I felt most unlikely.

Now I could play Cool McRadical and say oh I totally thought that, but fuck no. I mentioned earlier when we started getting the steady rhythmic growling noises. I thought, wait a second…no. But listening to those noises, it just sounded like, well a snoring dragon, I just didn’t think the film would take us down that route but now of course I realize it was all laid out there in plain sight and there were a lot of clues suggesting the end. Thinking about it I’m laughing that I didn’t include this scene earlier when watching and reviewing this but, when Deacon and Gray first approached the church, there was a wild dog on the hill barking, and when the two men turned to see it, you could see the dog was eating something, and Gray quipped “Always something big eating something smaller.”

THAT’S LITERALLY THE DAMN ENDING! Lol

Pluss the story from the Italian priest about them driving these deities and evils out. They were not joking, or being metaphorical. They actually pushed out into those tunnels a goddamn monster. And the comments Gray made too about discussing Pagans worshipping things that were actually there. I mean yeah. Looking back there were a LOT of things pointing the way. But it was never pushed out there in an overly ‘this is important’ wink at the camera way. Which I’m glad for. Seriously I really am. I just.

I love this. This was the most downer, what the hell, holy fuck ending they could’ve gone with, and I love it. I was expecting an antichrist baby devouring winged devil child again. Thank Pazuzu that wasn’t the case.

I mean I joked about it mirroring Godforsaken a few times and it sort of did yeah, but now seeing how they used that, I dig it. It was very misleading from where we ended up and it was a good trick. I fell into the film and. I feel bad that I will not be able to experience that moment again, where I had to pause the movie and go back because I thought I saw what looked like a sharks tooth or broken bottle, only to look at it paused and realize, that’s a tooth, and there are more than one.

I loved that realization and had I missed it, I would’ve been a bit lost until the stomach acid. But yeah, that was a hell of a thing.

This his a lot of good notes with me and the pacing was brilliant. I loved the focus on more character driven bits, which really did help build the story and felt more natural, The pub talks between Deacon and Gray were great. It fed us background and information on what was coming. Mark was a great contrast to the pair, I really thought at first I wouldn’t care for him or Gray. Seeing Gray high on energy all the time would’ve gotten old fast. But the moment you see him and Deacon begin their friendship, it sold me, and Mike was appropriately a dick, while also managing to work with the two men as a team. Even with his unhidden distaste for Deacon, and his reminders that he was essentially there to keep Deacon on a leash and make sure things don’t end up like they did on his main screw up with the three priest.

Man even that, I’m loving that in such a twisted way. The fact he actually DID replay the same events this time around that cost the lives of those three priest when they exposed the hoax of the church only to get murdered, all because he had a feeling it could be a real miracle there, and once again he decides they should see this through and this time, he didn’t escape death. Just. Yeah. Gotta love it.

The locations were beautiful, the camera work was great and there were some shots that honestly I had to wonder were they shots from cameras Gray setup, that caught the hillside during sunrise and sunset, or had that been just a creative choice. There were moments they did sneak in hints of a very minimalist score too. It wasn’t overbearing or enough to stand out when it happened. But you certainly caught it a few times. Thankfully it wasn’t used for jump scares, just very well selected moments we’ll say.

Again hats off to the director and writer Elliot Goldner, they’ve mostly stuck to doing television directing but what a hell of an entry into film.

All the actors themselves did phenomenal, and have a sizeable body of work in television, both Gordon Kennedy(Deacon) and Aldan McArdle(Mark), where as Gray actually has a bit more work under his belt as editor. Which is a bit of a shame as they really are a rather good actor.

The fact this film doesn’t have as high of a score as it deserves is really saddening. But I guess that files it away nicely as a hidden gem. But also having had the film released under two different names between the states and overseas that likely hurts a bit.

The film absolutely deserves the praise it received from critics and I only hope others will pass the word along about this film. I would’ve absolutely shit myself and loved it the whole time had I seen this when it came out and I was desperate for good horror films. I was going through them to a point back then that Netflix couldn’t keep up. One of those things were you cycle movies for 12 minutes because you HAVE seen everything. Glad I included this on the list and again, the ratio we are at now? Of good versus crap films. This is a good steady course and it’s a surprising one.

If all these movies had been on the level of this one, I’d feel spoiled, and I think bored. Too much of a good thing does spoil them, and finding rare bits like this floating out there. It’s great.

The editing they did on this was spot on, the reasoning for the cameras made sense, especially the not being able to drop them at any time, AND them providing a source of light. All of it fit, they even made the comment, Gray did that he honestly forgets he’s wearing it after the first two days, They laid out very carefully and meticulously all the story bits and kept us guessing till we got closer to the end and eventually were swallowed whole.

This film did its research, it presented a lot of facts and gave us enough to get us where we were going, without feeling like your head was being filled by a Wikipedia entry, or like other films, delivering 5 minutes of fast dialogue that no one should randomly have on hand about top secret projects as a stoner.

Yes that still bugs me from Devil’s Pass, but whatever. We’ve moved on to bigger better and brighter things.

I really don’t know why movies like this with church figures and ancient demons, rituals and now centuries old forgotten monsters, really get me to a happy place, but they do. Especially when they don’t fuck up and start copying other films before it or going full exorcist mode. It’s a nice little sub genre of sorts and any time it gets away from the crazy cultist or cgi demon, I’m happy.

Seriously go out and champion for this film. Tell your friends to watch it, tell Grandma to watch it and then accept the judging looks you get as a chance to tell them “Your welcome!”.

This is going on my shelf, I am ordering it the first chance I get and I will happily put it with my overly large collection. Seriously I have so many Vinegar Syndrome movies now they need two large boxes. It’s out of control, I need a bigger house.

But yes, I will not carry on a stretched out rant of praise, there isn’t much I would criticize to be fair, and yeah. I love the film. Great work all around and lets hope for more of the same soon.

Until tomorrow, if you happen to be out at night and see a person you know to be dead, standing in the bushes looking very much alive? Just go. Don’t contemplate your choices or your life. Just go, and maybe watch some old Pixar movies, be thankful to be alive and not slowly digested over a thousand years.