Day 30 JAWS & JAWS 2

One of the better examples of a solid film and good follow up sequel. Which again gets overlooked.

Also a film I will be drinking and talking about when reviewing the whole series on my podcast.

Also a film that, like most growing up and watching it, made me scared shitless to go in the ocean, but also heavily influenced me to want to be an oceanographer.

Also a film that me and my dad would watch a lot together.

Every time a new version of the movie came out, we would always watch it together. It was one of the first films I brought over on Blu-ray when it was just becoming a thing AND my sound system so he could hear how awesome 5.1 DTS was.

Which is also why watching the movie is sad for me, it’s one of those tied in with my memories of our father, and I remember a week after his funeral my pre-ordered copy of Jaws 4k arrived in the mail, I was planning on watching it with him after my birthday. I only recently was finally able to sit through it and watch. I just couldn’t really bring myself to do so before.

I’ll always remember it was fun watching with him because he always jumped at the same three parts in the movie and he’d always laugh because he KNEW those scenes were coming. He’d seen the movie thousands of times but still, he would always jump. I don’t jump when watching the movie but I have my own specific set of scenes I love seeing and just get giddy over seeing and knowing they’re coming.

In both cases it stands as a testament I think to how this movie has stayed relevant and with people for so long. It was just a solid, well done movie, despite it’s nearly infinite list of screw ups, failed shots, bad decisions, and rushed shooting.

The book and the film stand shoulder to shoulder together which is an accomplishment itself. Even with certain characters not surviving in the book that did in the movie. This film, much like the Exorcist GOT the book parts right, and knew how to pull itself together, and not get lost in the book, or become something all together entirely separate from.

The sequel though not too much is said about its behind the scenes fun, also managed to hold its head above the water and keep up with its much bigger stronger and certainly more well loved sibling. Even if the sequel and most the others are now largely forgotten.  Seriously most people I’ve talked to about it remember the end of the first film, nothing of the second film. The 3D shark from 3 and the youtube clip of a ship ramming into a shark and both exploding for some reason in the final Jaws movie.

It’s safe to say the sequels did not hold up over time and got worse after the second one. At least part two had the sense to be a continuation of sorts. Albeit in a kinda funny way, though not nearly as funny as the ungodly far reaching revenge shark in part for complete with burn scars to make it seem like this is the original shark, seeking revenge. I really wish I were joking.

But let’s get on with talking about one of my favorite films from my childhood, through today and its underrated sequel, shall we?

JAWS

When you have the idea to make a movie about a killer shark, based off a best selling book, and people know you’ve got pure raw talent. Of course it’s a good idea. But when you just came off of one film, and decide to have the balls to say “let’s film this movie on the ocean and not on a sound stage or lake.” That’s some dumbass level of balls.

But Spielberg wanted to do it. He then found out very quickly why films don’t shoot on the open ocean. He also learned rushing an animatronic creature meant to work in salt water is also a bad decision as the film is hilariously known for the phrase “The sharks not working”. But aside a rarely if ever working shark, two actors wanting to kill each other, sinking a boat that nearly took out the crew and actors, and driving a director and studio insane with the cost and problems. The movie worked, and all of this added to it’s benefit.  Not seeing the shark made it that much scarier, Quint and Hooper hating each other was genuine and it worked for the characters on screen. It was a perfect mess.

Jaws begins much like the book. A sharks eye view, swimming lazily through the ocean looking for a snack and chilling out in its new feeding territory. Meanwhile a flirty dirty hippie is being flirty and dirty with a drunk dirty flirty hippie, and the two dirty flirty hippies run off to clean their hippy stink off in the ocean.

It should be noted this was my earliest CLEAREST memory of seeing nudity in a movie. The first which I can never recall comes from the famous story my mom tells of the video store accidentally giving us Debby Does Dallas, instead of SUPERMAN. And 4k has certainly preserved those early memories.

I said memories. I double checked.

As our hippy lady makes her way into the ocean for a skinny dip, her drunk flirty dirty hippy friend struggles with his own life choices to drink as much as he had, and the realization he has been defeated by his own clothes as he fails to undress himself.

I think it should also be noted that the ocean is balls freezingly cold at night, so skinny dipping while horny in a cold ass salty ocean? Not as romantic as it sounds kids.

Trust me.

So Miss Hippy skinny dippy is bobbing along happy as can be, until she gets tugged down twice like the bobber on the line of a fishing pole as she’s being nibbled. Moments before it becomes a full fledged bite, AND WE’RE OFF!!! It’s the Indy Shark 500!

Seriously this shark is just thrashing this screaming lady left to right, side to side. In the most painful and fastest way possible. It’s chilling, violent and just as suddenly as it happened, she’s pulled under and that’s it. The oceans returns to being calm and it’s like nothing happened. While she’s being devoured under the surface, and her drunk hippy friend passes out, unaware how damn lucky he was. Even if he didn’t get lucky. HA!

Thus begins our movie.  

We then are introduced to Broders. He’s name is Brody, but my family has a dog named Brody and I call them Broders. So there we have it.

Broders is a cop from the city, moving down to a smallish island town, where he lords over the little people and threatens them daily with his big city knowledge. Or he actually enjoys the small town quiet life, escaping New York so he can enjoy a place where the crime rate is almost none existent, and kids Karate chopping fences is the biggest offense. Sounds like a sweet gig.

So Broders gets called out to investigate a disappearance. Our drunk, now sober hippy friend is concerned about the lady he lost track of so we’re hot on the trail to discover what became of her! Which we soon find out as what’s left of her torso is found washed up on the beach covered in seaweed and sand crabs.

Well Sheriff Broders is not going to take this event slowly. He gets right to work, after an initial report from the coroner comes back stating it was possibly a shark attack, He visits the local Hobby Lobby and picks up some crafting and paint supply to begin making some Beach closed signs. Which he entrust this task to his deputy. Though he demands an older woman at the station do the lettering as her handwriting is something that resembles what normal people can read.

But his efforts to save lives are thwarted as the Mayor and his squad show up and tell him to swallow a chill pill and pull the panties out of his crack, because this was an overreaction, also the coroner had a change of heart after the mayor took him to the local rub and tug, now saying it wasn’t a shark attack but a simple boating accident. Even if this rustles the jimmies of Sheriff Broders, they go an extra step and slap him with the “You don’t have the authority” to close the beaches on your own.

So Broders gives up and says fine, whatever. I’m just trying to do my job!

Amity Island is a summer town, which means Summer dollars. For those not familiar, I offer a short story.

I used to work for an Italian restaurant, the owner finally got his wish to expand it into a franchise. He bought a placed in a town nearby called Allyn. Allyn is a summer town. It’s so small, it takes less than a minute to drive through it. He bought one of the bigger restaurant spots there. Decked it out and spent a LOT of money doing so. Summer came around and cash just flew in. He made it rain on our chicken Parm. The original place where I worked became the red headed stepchild and we were neglected, because this new place was the money draw. Then summer came to a close and. The money vanished with it. Suddenly he had two expensive places to run, with no money, and no steady customers to fill them. Not long after he had to close both places and moved to Florida.

So yeah. Summer towns need summer dollars, and some places only stay open for the summer, then close the rest of the year.

Broders doesn’t like being told what to do when he feels he’s protecting everyone, but he keeps his mouth shut and his eyes on the ocean. Which is not the best thing to watch. Between a sagging old man and the towns love for Golden Coral, it’s not the best sights.

This brings up one of my favorite scenes I look forward too. Not because someone is gonna die! But how they film the death. Little Alex Kintner wanted to keep swimming even if he was beginning to prune. He will learn his lesson! YES a shark sees him onhis yellow raft and decides it’s time to chow down.

It’s a pretty awesome scene if you watch closely because the shark is seen attacking more how sharks are known to, twisted on its side, thrashing. Watching the scene you see his fins thrashing and twisting out of the water, even the silhouette of his head. It’s pretty intense and violent. I love it. The film is and has been classified as a horrr film for years, but it really never shows you any gore. This death however is close, until later on of course. All you see here is the thrashing and boy waving in a panic before the movie cuts to the boy being dragged under water, and a blood vloud appearing in the water.

Of course NOW the town finally decides to panic and the mayor, has some explaining to do!

It’s also fun to note that the mother and son team, the Kintners. Met up many years later in a funny incident. The actor playing the son who was eaten by Bruce the shark(that’s the name they gave to the mechanical shark) became a cook and ran a small diner kitchen. One day the actress happened into the place and saw one of the specials was called ‘The Alex Kintner”, so she informed the waitress she was in Jaws and played the mom, she got excited and had the chef come out and meet her. Was a fun little moment and glad it happened.

BACK TO THE MOVIE, I know! I’m all over the place.

So now facing a young boys death, and possible loss of points in the re-election campaign. He decides they can’t cover this one up and calls a town meeting to discuss what’s to be done. So a reward is offered up for the catching of the shark. Which grants us mere mortals the single best entrance of a character. Quint.

Quint swaggers into the room unnoticed, sits down. Listens to everyone bitching and complaining about what to do, how things’ll be effected when they close the beach for 24 hours. Then he rakes his nails over a chalk board to inform everyone the time to shut up is now! He’s going to speak and they better listen!

He lays out his plan to catch and kill the shark for 15k. It’s left up to peoples imaginations whether or not he drew the crude chalk shark on the board swallowing a boy. But I like to imagine he did.

Broders likes him and begins picturing what it would be like to be held by such a man, kept safe at sea by them, and what it must look like watching them set sail with no return date given. But no one takes his offer and they all go about their blabbering.

As Mama Kintner put out a bounty on the shark, everyone and their cousins, nephews, brothers, former roommates are out trying to kill the shark. Using legal methods of chumming, dragging nets, fishing poles. As well as some not so conventional and or legal methods. Like dynamite fishing, and attacking other fishing boats.

There was even a close call in the early morning with two men, one of whom sacrificed his wifes holiday roast to try catching the shark. Which failed miserably resulting in his nearly getting eaten.

But here at the craziness of Shark Hunt, Broders is trying to keep things calm, and we get our next member in this man sandwich. Hooper. Hooper is a well off shark loving college boy who’s made a living off of studying sharks. He’s the polar opposite of Quint, who makes his living off of killing sharks and big game fishing.

Broders is happy to have a new friend so he immediately offers to share his house and wife with him. Which Hooper will gladly accept later. As the many fisherman out and about end up catching what they believe to be the big bag shark Bruce, A tiger shark. But Hooper is not convinced.

It’s a happy moment when the shark is caught and everyone is eager to celebrate and get paid drinking money. But Hooper is content to poop smear all over Broders happiness. Mrs. Kintner on the other hand is present to not poop smear Broders. But instead to walk up to him and scream”SLIPPITY SLAPPITY BITCHES GET SLAPPED!”

Which he does! But not because he’s a bitch. But because she found out about the hippy girl killed in the beginning, and blames him for keeping the beaches open. Which upsets Broders, having to take the blunt end of a dildo fisting meant for the mayor.

So he drowns himself in wine, lots and lots of wine. While Hooper gnaws and chews on the dinner Broder’s wife made and he neglected. After a few short stories about Hooper and his fondness for sharks having come from his boat as a kid being torn apart by a shark, It’s a fun moment and starts setting up some ground work of an actual friendship and Hooper being a cool approachable guy.

So drunk Broders and dinner stealing Hooper take off to gut the shark that was captured and killed earlier that day. Sadly no half devoured body comes flying out in a death pose. Instead we get a license plate and a few fish.

Saddened by this, Broders realizes they have a big problem, and he won’t be cleaning up the deck after that fish gutting. His new bestie takes him on a boat ride out into the ocean. Informing him that sharkies are busy at night, shopping, moonlighting and gathering candy. Broders isn’t cool with this as he’s afraid of the water. But lives on an island.  Makes sense.

Fortunately they don’t discover the sharkie. But they do discover the boat on one fisherman who didn’t make it back. This is another scene that our dad always jumped at. It’s also a last minute addition Spielberg added because he just felt they needed another scare. So while exploring the boat remains, Hooper leaps into the water, clearly not caring about his life and a killer shark. He discovers a tooth! Hurrah! Proof of a killer shark! But alas he loses the tooth, and loses his shit when out of a shark sized hole in the boat comes floating into view a decapitated head with a missing eye!

It’s reasonable to assume, this does not bode well with the mayor. He’s a little miffed at the fact these guys ruined his victory parade by cutting open the shark and losing a tooth. He even suggest this is all made up so Broders can get his way at close the beaches down. BUT HE STILL WON’T BUDGE!!

He WILL however, for the opening of the summer, allow Broders, his friend Hangin with Mr Hooper, and the coast guard to setup a parameter in the water, shark towers and armed sharkshooters.

No they don’t have sharkshooters, I just liked the word Sharkshooters.

Of course things go well. Some little shits think it’s a good idea to troll swimmers by wearing a fake fin on their head. After the kids are taught a valuable lesson about not screwing with people, by way of pointing a few loaded rifles at their heads. We notice the pee content of the ocean has gone up just a bit more in that moment.

We also come up to another scene I really love how it was shot and the effect. As people are calming down though, the real shark is strolling along and spots the sheriffs son and friends in a boat. He decides to have a word with the boys about the trouble his father has been making by accusing him of murder, when he is just trying to survive.

Unfortunately another man in a nearby boat gets involved and the shark isn’t happy.

It’s actually a great and seriously scary scene. You see everyone knocked from their boats and in the water. The man who was helping the kids try to get their sail up is clawing at his boat to get ontop of it, and we see an above shot. Showing the shark swimming just under him and down he goes. Dragged down by his leg. Which gives us our third gore scene.  It’s a pretty realistic scene and a bit creepy.

So the Sheriff’s son survived thankfully. And Broders has zero fucks to give for any legal issues now. There was a murder on a crowded beach. The shark left, flipping a fin as he went swimming by.

He beats the piss out of the mayor(figuratively) and tells him either his signature or his blood will end up on a contract to let Quint kill the shark(He didn’t threaten him) So armed with a license to Kill it’s time for our Manwich to set sail and the final act of the film to begin.

Quint is not a man to listen to authority, or take orders. Hooper is a man who hates being talked down to and not taken seriously, and Broders is an envious doggo to be surrounded by two well crafted statues of what it is to be a man.

It’s actually a pretty fun setup and it becomes very quickly apparent that Quint is in charge and a bit out of his mind on the open ocean. But they are all three of them invested in this quest to slay the shark no matter what the cost.

Giving us another scene both my dad and I enjoyed, and one he would always jump regardless of knowing it was coming. It’s when Broders is complaining about being made to do the smelliest job ever of tossing chum into the water. For those who don’t know. Chum is usually a bucket filled with fish parts, guts and sometimes alcohol. Don’t ask.

But it’s while putting out another chum market, and complaining about the working ranks on the the ship The orca, that Broders gets  his hand nearly bitten off as the shark pops out of the water nomming on the chum he’s eagerly tossing out. It scares whatever bodily waste Broders had inside him outside of him, and brings out the adlibbed line ‘We’re gonna need a bigger boat.”

But they will not be getting a bigger boat. Though it’s at this point as well the men come to realize just how big a problem they’re dealing with. A 25 ton shark. Nearly the size of the boat they’re on. It starts off a fun action piece as they begin a new fun challenge. “How many barrels of air does it take to tire out a shark?” Which they soon realize, somehow. To the surprise of all of them. That answer is not 3 barrels.

Though they nearly catch the shark. Bruce just isn’t having it and gets annoyed. So much so he attacks their boat that evening during a fun sing along and scar sharing discussion.

The crew are not left with a boat that’s slowly flooding, engines aren’t working, and worst of all a killer shark is out there stalking them.

So with nothing much left to lose. Quint decides to let Hooper have his turn. They tried killing the shark Quint’s way, so it’s his time to shine now! Hooper has brought a shark cage with them and the trio set about putting it together and dropping it in the water.

It’s a pretty tense scene with Hooper underwater with a giant killer great white. The scene had some scenes shot of forced perspective by a shark team who went out with a smaller version of the cage and a tiny Hooper doll inside, while filming a great white circling and swimming near the cage. It provided them with the happiest of accidents as the shark accidentally ended up tangled in the line the boat was using for the cage prop and it began thrashing and wildly biting out, trying to free itself. In the process it nearly destroyed the cage. So Spielberg used it. Even filming an additional scene up top where Quint and Broders are trying to help somehow and prevent the shark from not only breaking the crane holding their friend up underwater. But also not take them down with it. Hooper decides it’s a good time to sneak off and does just that, finding a nice place to take a piss for the last 15 minutes of the movie.

The pair uptop pull up a broken apart cage, filled with dread at the thought they lost their friend, and soon they as well would join him. Bruce decides they need some cheering up so he leaps out of the water and smiles for them. Chomping away. Unfortunately Quint slips down and meets his untimely though foreshadowed end at the jaws of Bruce.

I avoided talking about it, because everyones talked to death about it, But yes, referring to Quint’s speech about the U.S. Indianapolis, and how he was among the few survivors.

Now all alone, on the ocean, aboard a quickly sinking boat. Broders scrambles for a weapon, anything he can use. Bruce breaks through a window and recommends he use one of the scuba tanks so he can swim off to safety. But Broders instead begins beating him with it until he takes it in his mouth to stop the beating and swims off.

Broders climbs up to the birds nest which is now low enough to the water Anything can get to him. But he has a rifle, a hope and a prayer. He begins taking pot shots at Bruce, aiming for the can of air in his mouth until we get the last iconic moment from this film, where Broders takes aim and says “Smile you son of a bitch!” fires and the shark explodes.

Just when the shark is no more, and Broders is floating on a piece of the boat. He finally lets rip the mother of all farts. Unfortunately he was not alone. Hooper not only survived but heard that fart. Smelt it even, and is now forever scarred by it. The two cuddle up together and grieve Quint’s being eaten as they kick board their way to shore, and the movie concludes.

Another thing I absolutely love about this movie is the soundtrack. John Williams is responsible for most the music from our childhoods, and the music from Jaws is exceptional. Every track is amazing, and it really helped bring the move a step up. Which it already was pretty damn amazing. The score just compliments it.

The movie was one of the first films beginning to coin summer blockbuster, set a lot of records and those same records would be crushed by what became the giants of the 80’s. The movie despite all it was up against did great and was quickly ripped off by everyone imaginable. Most famous of all is a very long, very boring Italian film which ripped off the entire story beginning to end. Just….very Italian.

But behold, there was a sequel. Which was, at the time, the highest grossing sequel to the original. Until Sylvester Stallone decided to make a sequel to Rocky and that just. Well yeah. Can’t beat that.

But much like the original, the sequel had it’s share of troubles. Spielberg didn’t want to direct it for one, or be a part of it. Roy Scheider also didn’t want anything to do with it, but he had to out of a contractual obligation with Universal.  The film also went through some directors and a book was written about the production as well. Much like the first film, because people genuinely were curious to learn more about it. So, let’s dive on in!

JAWS 2

This movie opens much the same way as the first, a shark casually strolling around his natural habitat. Kicking back and enjoying the ocean. Only there’s no hippie to chomp on this time. Instead we are greeted to a new musical score, and divers exploring and taking pictures around the wreckage of Quint’s boat from the first film, The Orca. The shark being a part of the home owners association, informs the men it is illegal to take photos without the consent and express permission of the ocean life organization. So he kills the photographer.

Meanwhile Sheriff Broders, still holding his office, as is the mayor. Are attending the ceremony for the Amityville charity..thing. It’s a thing and people, rich people are drinking and celebrating.

In the midst of all this, we are subtly introduced to who we will be following for a majority of the film. Teenagers. That’s right. Teenagers!. The movie didn’t want to repeat the slow build up tension of the first film. It wanted to scare people and the money from their wallets too. So the plot is different this time around, but it works. Even if it paints every shark as being a ticking time bomb of meat eatery. The kids thankfully are likable and not as annoying as other films would make teenagers out to be. Somewhere between the 70’s and late 80’s young actors dropped the ball and became hugely annoying.

But back to the movie. Life on Amity is still more or less the same. Old people dealing with old people problems, and Broders still dealing with his family adjusting to island life, and his kids being kids. We also get more time with the teenagers. Discovering who fits what trope, which ones are dating who. As well as their plans They’re going out for a boating day. Apparently being rich and a teenager has its benefits. Or being an islander means you get a boat and everyone hangs out on them in the water.

It’s lighthearted and fun honestly. We have water balloon fights, where the geeks are still not safe from, even on water. The kids are relaxing and enjoying themselves, which is the important thing.

As is the new shark. The new shark is happy because dinner is being served up in the island shores a former resident Bruce the shark left Yelp reviews for. Leading us to kill number 2!!

A woman is out with her friend water skiing. Sadly her friend becomes shark food, and the lady in the boat. Has the worst luck on the worst day of her life. The shark attacks her boat, putting a hole in it, she goes flailing around and, I wish it weren’t so comical, but god I am glad it is. She flails around the boat, an open can of gasoline hits her foot and she decides to hoist the gas over her head, Which ends of smothering her in gasoline, so she drops it. She then decides, while covered in gasoline. To grab a flare gun and shoots at the shark. Setting the boat, herself AND the shark on fire. Thankfully the shark survives. The lady not so much.

Sheriff Broders nose is twitching and he smells shark business!

As he begins to look into this matter. His deputy is investigating the abandoned boat of the photographer at the beginning of the film. It is on this outing that the deputy discovers something that might come into play a bit later in the movie. A large powerline under water supplying the town with its power. How…CONVENIENT!!!!

Meanwhile our partying teens are parked out with their boats by a lighthouse. It’s here we get to meet another familiar face. Not for having been in the first film however. But for being famous in another Franchise in that he gave a killer his signature look. We have the actor who played Shelly in Friday the 13th part 3, who famously brought the hockey mask Jason later puts on. We also get a spoopy moment as the teenagers discover a half eaten dead killer whale on the beach.

Broders is there to investigate it and tells the ocean lady on site that he has experience with sharks and he believes that’s what killed this Orca! But she’s not having any of it. He’s back in familiar territory not being listened too!

Even the mayor won’t hear him out. The shark sensing this, and possibly wanting to have words with the man who killed a fellow shark. The shark sends out a piece of boat along the shore. Close enough for Broders to find it and examine it. Which leads to the uncovering of a body! The charred lady who set herself ablaze.

He needs to bring together the old shark crew! Since Quint is in pieces at the bottom of the ocean, haunting people out of the water and mocking their way of life. He can only call on Hooper! But Hooper is sadly busy on a boat called the Aurora out in the arctic and won’t be within radio signal until Spring. So he’s on his own. Which also is a good cover as to why Dryfus got out of this film and won’t be returning.

Broders is ready not to drop the ball on this one. He’s got shark towers on the beach, he even went the extra mile to poison tip some of his .357 rounds. Which I don’t know if needle dropping poison onto hollow points, and using candle wax to seal the poison into the bullets works but. We’ll go with that.

So patrolling the shores is making him feel happy. But it’s putting the mayor and his partners at an unease. They’re trying to get investors for their town, but you can’t do that with a shark sniffing man in a tour! Which is another fun scene. As the panicked mayor and his rich friend try to rush off to get their investors off the beach before they see him there. A girl and her mom stop them asking what that man in the tower is doing. They try telling them it’s an observation tower. But the little girl informs the two men it’s a shark tower. That she’d seen one in Florida. The two men panic and begin panicking and tell the girl she’s wrong that it’s an observation tower, used for bird watching, and observation.

Unfortunately Broders thinks he sees a shark, so he rings his little bell as happy as he can and shouts for everyone to get out of the water. He makes his way down the ladder as fast as he can and with the social grace of Seattle protestor, begins wildly firing into the ocean at what he thought was the shadow of a shark, and turned out to be a school of blue fish. Who will file a wrongful death suit later in the year against him.

Fortunately the entire town now thinks he is crazy, which gives him total immunity to stop wearing clothes and have everyone believe he’s just nuts. However he does get one bright ray of sunshine on his cloudy day. The pictures from the dead photographer came back, discovering he took the pictures of the Orca remains, as well as what looks to be the inside of a sharks mouth as it chomped down on the camera, and its owner.

Feeling this is enough to go forward and mic drop at the city hall. He brings it with him and shows it off to the heads of the city. The picture, for reference. Is a close up shot of a sharks eye, its snout and curve of its mouth. But when examining it, everyone decides it’s too dark to decipher, and likely seaweed on the camera. Another blow to his ego, another case for playing the crazy card and running the town in the nude. Until they decide to fire him, because he pissed off all the powerful people. He should’ve gone through legal channels instead of acting impulsively. But he’s free to drink all he wants and roam where he wants.

Meanwhile the teenage crew is discussing a late night trip to the lighthouse for a picnic. But Broders son can’t go. He’s grounded and told no sea trips by his dad. But he has a crush on a hot girl, so she gets him to disobey his dad and agree to sneak out. Things are being setup for later I think.

OF COURSE IT IS!!!

What’s even MORE of a setup, is that former Chief Broders son sneaking off, has also brought along his little brother. Who threatened to alert their parents to his sneaking out unless he took him out with him. So of course this will only end well.

NO IT OF COURSE WON’T!!!

So our doomed group of teenagers take off on their sailboats of doom for the lighthouse of death, not at night as earlier said, but during the daylight. Because it’s easier to see the bodies for us of course. It’s a nice enough scene though, even if it is sort of a retread of the earlier more playful version, where all the kids joke and show off their boats.

Of course on their way we have to give the shark a light snack to help with the traveling. So a nearby school of divers is readying to take to the sea and go out for a light stroll.  No one dies but they do get a pretty up close personal scare from our shark and their now confirmed burnt face. Because everyone digs scars.

So having missed out on a meal. The shark is speeding along in a hurry for the new batch of food headed for the lighthouse. Just in time oddly enough for Broders to discover their kids are gone.

So now we begin the madness at sea.

As the kids sail off for their destination. One of the boats breaks away from the group. Casanova has decided to wow his lady with Coca Cola cups and some fine beverages to woo her into some smooching and romping on the boat. But she’s a classy lady and request a blanket of him, to keep her butt from getting bruises. As he’s hunting down this blanket, the shark decides these children need a chaperone. So the shark knocks the horndog out of the boat and eats him, Preserving the girls bruised booty from further abuse.

Even though he’s no longer Sheriff. Broders can’t help but take an interest in what’s going on with the towns business, taking over a boat with the new chief of police to get to his kids. Even calling up a helicopter to scout ahead of them and get those kids back to safety.

Which the kids have yet to discover they’re at risk, as they hadn’t discovered what happened to their friends in the boat trailing behind.. Or question the loud screams coming from it.

So these kids are screwed. The shark is the Jason Vorhees of the ocean, and they’re all waiting to be killed off by the shark. Which it is all too happy to do. In fact it is almost encouraged when one of the geek kids is busy pumping his boat full of air to keep it afloat and while doing a bad british accent trying to impress…….no one listening. He pops his boats balloon, and the shark attacks him because he should feel bad for what he was doing.

Unfortunately his friends save them as they aren’t entirely bullies, they just don’t always care for him. But meanwhile the kids are learning very quickly why they were always told to pay attention of their surroundings when driving, as well as sailing, as two kids trying to race off from the scene end up smashing into a boat they could’ve avoided but just didn’t look in time to do so.

Luckily, for now. Everyone is safe. Humans 0 Shark 0. But there are some injuries and the group needs to find a way to stay together instead of drifting apart. And stay on shark watch. The challenges begin. They decide the best course of action is to rope their boats together. Keep them in sort of a loosely formed group.

Thankfully for the kids, the helicopter has found them. Although it is now time we go back to something from much earlier in the film. A moment with their resident ocean expert who informed Broders, that sharks don’t just smell blood, they also move dependent on sound. So the roaring blades above the water. The kids cheering for their saviors arrival. All of this is just serving to irritate a shark looking to keep a migraine from happening. So the shark attacks the helicopter. As comical as it sounds. It looks just as. Until the shark vanishes and it looks like an actual helicopter crash and we see bits of the blades fly off and tare into the sales of the kids boats. Score Shark 1 Kids 0

So the kids decide they maybe should abandon their caution to try and help save Broders youngest. Who’s not really in any danger. He’s on a upside down boat hugging the fin and a lady was coming to him only to find she should’ve stayed out of the water, and gives him the gift of PTSD

Shark 2 Kids 0

Broders is out on the ocean, no word from the dead pilot, no word on the radio period. He has no idea how to operate anything, let alone what he’s doing. To make it even funner, a storm is coming and bringing rain.

Recently traumatized Shawn, dealing with the fact a woman was destroyed in front of him, is having everyone scream and yell at him to grab a rope they’re tossing at him. Either to help him, or drag him across the water in hopes of catching the shark and a sweet reward for said shark capture.

But he eventually listens to them and wraps the rope around himself as it’s tossed over to him. Happy to discover the group has no intention of dragging him through the water. In an odd way, whether intended or not. The group is very much recreating the conditions Quint found himself back on the Indianapolis. Minus a few hundred sharks. They’re all stranded and waiting their turn for a shark to get them. Which you know you begin praying for someone to get bit when SOMEONE starts openly praying for Jesus to save them.

But Jesus is not-a-vailable.

Speaking of a savior. Broders runs into three teens, including his oldest on a boat. They inform him of what happened and how sorry he was for having taken his little bro. Broders doesn’t care or have time for this, let alone helping them out. He simply tells them to make their way to the lighthouse and weight there as he takes off leaving them to their demise as he takes off for the other remaining kids.

He thankfully makes his way to the kids, standed by the rocky shores of the island they decided to head off toward. Just as he’s about to help them. The shark surprised Broders by popping out to say BOO!. Which prompts the former chief to ram his boat into the island. What’s his plan now? Who knows. But he’s got a supply chain of food in front of him in the form of a few bratty kids. But he won’t resort to cannibalism. Yet.

As one of the boats is stuck in the rocks. He uses a wench on the boat to try and give the kids something powerful they can hold too that will hopefully free the boat. But it gets stuck on something. Much like. It did. Earlier. In the movie. Hmmmmmmm. HHMMMMMMM!!!

The shark feels neglected so it decides to pop out and remind us that it still holds the high score so far. It could eat a girl, but it decides instead to nudge her with its fin. Freaking her out and rubbing the equivalent of sand paper across her skin. Ouchy. Broders in a fit of madness. Decides to abandon his boat for…..a rubber raft.

A rubber raft.

While climbing down the earlier mentioned and caught POWER LINE!!! Oh yeah. That’s back now! Broders has had enough of this. His job was taken from him. People think he’s crazy, and now a shark is mocking his people saving skills. So he begins his end game project.

Whacking off.

He starts whacking off a paddle on the side of a power cable, vibrating the waters below. Repeating this in the hopes. That the shark. Will bite the power lines. Hoping the shark wont attack him from below. Or the side. Imagine the Predator. But instead of Arnold luring the hunter to a trap hidden behind a log. He’s just blatantly holding onto it. A power cable. Taunting the shark to come at him and bite into it.

WHICH IT DOES!!

The shark bites the power cable and takes out all the power on Amity Island. While also unfortunately killing it. Not just killing it, but hurting a lot as it is killed, and fried. The shark is actually charred.

Brody 2 Shark 0

The kids believe they’re safe as they honestly think only one shark can exist in their ocean at a time. But it’s good enough for the rest of us, and we roll credits

The movie wasn’t as grand at the first one. It got mixed reviews. But it still as I said was the top grossing sequel at the time. Until Rocky 2 came along and then well. The rest of the 80’s happened. Seriously this was an absolutely magical time in movies to be out and about during those years.

The movie did financially well and pleased enough people. It was a bit far fetched at times. But it still managed not to be Ludacris. It does happen when one shark finds a feeding spot that others will follow. So it made sense that another great white would roam over that way. The film mentions only once an obscene idea that wouldn’t effect the franchise until the final film. Which was the idea of revenge. Which even the film ORCA The Killer Whale played with. Which got the idea from here.

The movie even though Broders didn’t want to appear in it, actually helped it along. He and the lady playing his wife helped this movie hold its credibility to the original. The movie could’ve used some John Williams, But he was busy with other projects like Superman. But it was a solid enough sequel to work. Things didn’t seem forced. It continued with the characters from the first film while working in some new faces. It tied in with the past events and those events influenced later decisions in the film. It’s another film people are discovering is on level with the original. Especially when you hold it next to JAWS 3-D and JAWS The Revenge. It’s widely considered the best sequel in the group by leaps and bounds. Because people actually cared when they made it. And it shows. Is it the greatest sequel of all time? No not by a long shot. Is the film AND the first even really horror? It is. By standards of the times. It’s weird because it got lumped into horror when the film is more an action suspense, with horror elements. But it has never, ever been moved out of horror as long as I’ve been alive. Which I mean I won’t argue. It scared the shit out of me and everyone else when it came out, enough to prevent a LOT of people from going swimming, and it still scares me the thought of swimming in the open ocean knowing what swims out there. But it also kept my interest enough to study sharks and hold a life long interest in them.

The only thing all 4 of those films does for sure with me. Is firstly, I wish there were more damn shark movies of good quality. Secondly. It makes me proud to know that even 3-D JAWS looks better than Deep Blue Sea. I said it. Come at me.

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